


Personal Log of Leonard McCoy

by Avirra



Series: Personal Logs of CMO, USS Enterprise [1]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-05
Updated: 2015-01-01
Packaged: 2018-01-07 12:19:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 74
Words: 35,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1119755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avirra/pseuds/Avirra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Entries from the log of the CMO of the good ship USS Enterprise.  These will be done in drab form and the goal is a total of 365 entries for the year that I will be posting here in blocks of five.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Stardate 2260.0 through 2260.0119

Stardate 2260

Personal log : Leonard McCoy - First day of this log. I'm going to attempt to make short daily entries for the coming year. Jim suggested it might give me a more objective view of how things are going out here when I review it later.

Back home, it's New Year's Day. Out here in the black, just another day. Some celebrate it out here, but it isn't the same thing. At least not to me, so I don't bother to attend any parties unless Jim drags me to one. Speak of the devil - he's at the door. McCoy out.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0034

I seriously wonder if Spock, Nyota and I are the only crewmembers aboard with a maturity level over the age of thirteen. Note to self - never allow Jim and Sulu to drink in the same room at the same time. The two of them feed off of one another in dangerous ways when alcohol is involved. If that wasn't bad enough, Chekov joined in with them. If I wasn't afraid they might steer us into a planet, I'd be letting time and a few sessions of praying to the toilet take care of their hangovers for them.

* * *

Stardate 2260.00727

New orders from Starfleet Command - we're detouring over to Nelphia in the Argelius B system. Their representative, Vantir Plassen, put in a request to meet with a Starfleet delegation as their planet is considering applying to join the Federation.

I get why Jim and Spock are going. I get why Nyota is going. What I don't get is why I'm going. I'm not a linguist, a politician or a diplomat. Of course, with Jim's luck, he'll have an allergic reaction to the first thing he touches. Guess I may as well be close by with my medkit.

* * *

Stardate 2260.00964

Well, that was different. The Argelians are a friendly and sociable bunch with two exceptions. Namely Jim and Spock. Blue eyes aren't found in their species, so those laser-blue eyes of Jim's creeped them out. They didn't react well to stoicism either - Jim and Spock had to leave before the meeting could even start. All of which meant that all the diplomatic talking done had to be done by me and Nyota.

Bless Nyota's heart, she did most of the talking while I just smiled and nodded a lot. Glad their booze is good despite the neon colors.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0119

We leave Nelphia tomorrow, but today is a formal farewell dinner. Jim's taking his lack of invitation better than expected. Nyota has tactfully explained to our hosts that they need to work on accepting physical differences if they want to become part of the Federation. We have been requested to provide media showing the different eye/hair/skin combinations that can be found among various species.

Nyota discovered another custom that she's leaving to me. Seems that the Argelians consider a drinking contest to be part of any formal dinner. Damn good thing I'm off-duty tomorrow.


	2. Stardate 2260.0158 thru 2260.0264

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 6-10

Stardate 2260.0158

Back in the black again. Jim was already pouting over missing out on the drinking competition, then Nyota had to go and tell him that the main entertainment was a group of extremely attractive female dancers wearing very drafty costumes. I thought he was going to lose his mind. Infant. Also had to deal with Scotty. He wanted to the ingredients for their nine-layer cocktail. I don't know why he expected me to know those details - after that drinking contest, I'm lucky I can remember my name. Worth it though - caused a stir when I won.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0175

Bad day. The instructors who are training medical staff for the black describe it as being similar to working in a hospital that happens to move around. A hospital? Only if it's one you live in every minute of every day - where the patients are always the same folks. No, the hospital comparison is bullshit. This is more like being a clinic in a small town with no other medical facilities around. We eventually know everyone. I wonder if they take serious enough consideration about how hard it can be to treat folks you know well and interact with.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0199

Jim hacked into my journal. Told me that saying 'bad day' doesn't count. Infant. Fine. Came close to losing Ensign Terrick yesterday. He got caught in the middle of a catastrophic chain reaction down in Engineering. Hell, I could still lose him. I have him in an induced coma right now to give him a chance to heal without dealing with the pain from the treatments he needs. Worst part? Looking into his friends' expectant faces and telling them that this wasn't some minor injury I could simply wave a regenerator over to make it all better.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0238

Cautiously optimistic on how recovery is going for Ensign Terrick. His response to the treatment is better than I had hoped for, but I still need to go painstakingly slow, repairing one layer at a time then allowing some rest before taking another step. His friends don't understand why it's taking so long and I can only give them vague answers - Ensign Terrick's privacy has to be taken into account, after all.

I may be able to restore full function to his arm or close to it, so long as he cooperates with therapy.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0264

This should prove to be interesting. I've asked Spock to encrypt my log to keep Jim from snooping in it. Spock was a bit hesitant at first as he thought it would be going against the Captain. When I explain it might be going against Jim, but not against the Captain, he was all for it. I think he's viewing this like a chess puzzle. Fine by me, long as it works. Jim's the one that insisted on me keeping a personal log and if I'm going to have a personal log, I want it to stay personal, dammit.


	3. Stardate 2260.02856 thru 2260.0391

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 11-15

Stardate 2260.02856

It was worth asking Spock for help. Jim stomped into my office with his nose all bent out of shape because he couldn't get into my personal log. After several minutes of lively discussion over the meaning of the word 'personal', he stomped back out pissier than an Atlanta debutante stood up at the cotillion. Pretty sure I heard Spock's name used in vain on his way out. Well, not much keeping who encrypted my stuff a secret. Only ones really able to pull that off well enough to stall Jim for any amount of time are Spock and Chekov.

* * *

Stardate 2260.03109

In my office, catching my breath. Guess that I'm lucky Ensign Vandermeer didn't break my jaw. At least that means I can repair the damage myself instead of having to drag Christine into this mess. The punch didn't bother me near as much as his accusation that my treatment of Ensign Terrick equates to torture. Yeah, part of me knows that understanding things have to be taken in stages to reach the best outcome is hard for a non-medical person to comprehend, but does the crew really think I'd deliberately inflict unnecessary pain on someone?

* * *

Stardate 2260.0338

Spock entered my office, securing the door behind him. Not his usual behavior, so he got my attention. Straight to the point, he asked why I hadn't put Ensign Vandermeer on report after he hit me. Good thing I was shocked speechless - I was just about to yell at Spock for peeking at my log when he continued and told me that Vandermeer had turned himself in. The ensign assumed that I'd already reported it and he wanted to tell his side of the story. Have reports I need to finish so asked if we could discuss this tomorrow.

* * *

Stardate 2260.03756

Spock and I met after we were both off-duty. Seems that when Vandermeer turned himself in to Spock, Spock found himself in the odd position of having someone complaining to him about me being unfeeling. I'll never forget what Spock said about that: 'I can think of several hundred adjectives to apply to you, Doctor, but 'unfeeling' would never make the list.' The look on his face when I told him that was the sweetest thing that anyone had ever said to me? Absolutely priceless. Damn, I wish I had a picture of that expression.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0391

Seems that talk with Vandermeer bothered Spock enough to enlist Nyota's aid. Found her waiting for me when my shift ended and she asked me to walk with her. At first, we walked without saying anything, then she started talking about how some otherwise intelligent people can behave like total idiots. At first, I thought Jim had done something again. Dawned on me who she actually meant when she asked how Terrick was doing. I told her about his progress, then we probably walked and talked for an hour - have to admit, I felt better after.


	4. Stardate 2260.0427 thru 2260.0538

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 16-20

Stardate 2260.0427

I was on the last stage of the repairs to Ensign Terrick's arm when Jim came in. From the way his eyes went immediately to my jaw, I knew he'd finally gotten past Spock's coding, but he covered very well. He said he wanted to be present when I brought Terrick back to full awareness. Pretended to believe that and told him that if he was looking for sensible answers about what had happened, he'd need to wait at least another day. Waking Terrick up went as hoped. Disoriented, but that was expected.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0448

Other than checkups, I've signed off on Ensign Terrick. Turned him over to Nurse Bierman for his physical therapy with orders to pull me in if he balks. I'm not letting days of work go to waste over him not following his after-care regimen.

Jim and I had a long talk about Vandermeer - I conceded Jim's point that Vandermeer needs to learn better ways to deal with stress if he ever wants his own command. Mutual agreement - he gets verbal counseling as well as notice that another incident will land him in the brig.

* * *

Stardate 2260.04752

The system we've entered isn't charted yet. One of the planets show signs that it might be able to support life. Jim's going to put us in orbit to get a better look and, if the readings look good, he wants to take a landing party down to the surface to get a closer look. Guess who he wants in the landing party? 'Come on, Bones. It will be fun, Bones.' Why do I always hear ominous music in my head whenever he says things like that? Probably my self-preservation instincts tossing out a warning.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0504

Looks like going down to the planet surface has to wait another day. I'm not in a hurry, but Jim's like a kid having to wait an extra hour for presents. There's what Spock is calling an 'atmospheric disturbance' over the main landmass. Atmospheric disturbance, my Aunt Fannie. Looks like this planet's version of a hurricane to me.

Interesting side note: Spock says there are possible signs of past intelligent life on that planet. Can't get a good enough reading from the long-range sensors for confirmation, so a landing party really is necessary for visual evaluation. Me having to be on it? Still debatable in my book.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0538

The weather planet side is starting to calm. Jim has made the call that when we finally head down, it will be by shuttle instead of teleporting. Odd - when I used to think about planet exploration as a kid, I thought machines and sensors did most of the leg work. I asked Spock about that. He explained that machines were extensively used at first but they haven't managed to invent one yet that can evaluate well as living person can. Plus, nothing sours relations with new races faster than first contact being made by a machine.

 


	5. Stardate 2260.0567 thru 2260.0667

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 21-25

Stardate 2260.0567

We're down on the planet surface. I'm wondering who did the alterations to the shuttle's armrests - the extra padding was appreciated.

No such thing as a dry place to land, so Jim went for less wet. Atmosphere is a little oxygen rich, but not outside of acceptable ranges. Still, since we'll be down here two or three days, I've given the landing team the list of symptoms to watch for and paired them off to keep an eye on one another.

Nice to be on solid ground again, even if the ground is green.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0589

Been a busy day of exploring the area in teams. While we have found a few signs that intelligent life has at least visited this world, we haven't found any signs yet that any have actually ever lived here. We've been taking a lot of samples, but Jim has admitted that the possibilities of this becoming a colony world are low.

Speaking of Jim, he's been teleported back aboard the ship to respond to a dispatch from Starfleet Command, so it looks like it will be me and the other four camping out here tonight.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0612

The weather has shifted here incredibly fast. No chance of teleports for the duration of this mess. I don't like where we are one bit - it's really flat with no tall growth around. While that means there's nothing around to fall on us, it also means the shuttle is the tallest thing around - very bad if there's anything like lightning here. Not my first hurricane, but sure as hell is my first in a shuttle and this is a first I'd just as soon have avoided. We've worked together and anchored the craft as well as it can be - hope it's enough.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0646

CMO Log Supplemental - Captain James Kirk recording. Once the storm abated enough to make contact, Lieutenant Uhura tried repeatedly to hail the shuttle Copernicus without success. A landing party led by Spock and myself beamed to the surface to investigate. The Copernicus was very heavily damaged, but so far, we have not found any signs of Lieutenants Aronica and Yelton, Ensigns Chbosky and Mayamoto or Doctor McCoy - living or dead. The one oddity Spock noted is that the shuttle door sustained the most damage and he doesn't believe it was all from the storm. Bones, where are you?

* * *

Stardate 2260.0667

CMO Log Supplemental - Captain James Kirk recording. After thorough searching found no signs of our missing people, our landing party beamed back to run a deeper series of scans that Spock hoped would detect something we missed. The scanners suddenly went from reading no life forms to reading nearly a hundred, then the readings dropped just as quickly down to four - all humanoid. Scotty locked on their life signs and teleported them aboard, calling immediately for emergency medical. All four remain unconscious, but have no obvious injuries aside from blue-gray skin tones. Aronica is still missing.


	6. Stardate 2260.0701 thru 2260.0797

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 26-30

Stardate 2260.0701

CMO Log Supplemental. Captain James Kirk recording. Bones is still unconscious as are the other three recovered yesterday. The presence of an unknown gas was detected in their lungs, but they have all been put into oxygen therapy with positive results. Their vital signs are steadily improving and their skin tones are gradually returning to normal. Hopefully, they will begin waking soon.

Further scanning located Aronica's body. Like the others, her skin tones were blue-gray but with darker blotches. I have ordered her body be placed into stasis until the survivors can answer some questions.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0723

CMO Log Supplemental. Captain James Kirk recording. The shuttle survivors have begun to wake, but all seem disoriented and are having difficulty with speech. Still, it was a huge relief when I saw Bones sit up even though it took myself and two nurses to calm him down until he realized where he was at. The burst of activity was short, but it seemed to drain all the energy out of him. Still, at least now Bones is sleeping peacefully instead of being unconscious. Sitting and watching as he sleeps. Tomorrow, maybe we'll get some answers about what happened to them.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0748

Personal log retrieved from Jim since I'm able to record in my own log again. The other three survivors and I are still not back to full duty status but improving. Whatever gas it was we inhaled took a toll on us. I don't remember much about the planet's inhabitants, but I think they were trying to protect us from the storm and didn't realize that we couldn't breathe what they breathe. Unsure why the gas was fatal to Lieutenant Aronica and not the rest of us, but hopefully the autopsy will tell us.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0777

On limited duty. I've used my half-day to work on Lieutenant Aronica's autopsy. Re-reading through her medical records gave me an idea of what I needed to take a closer look at - analysis confirmed it. She grew up on a colony world and it affected her lung development in what normally might be considered a good way - she had better lung capacity than anyone else on the shuttle. Unfortunately, that meant she inhaled larger amounts of the gas than the rest of us did. I have another theory as well, but want to run it by Spock first.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0797

We debriefed today about the incident planet-side. Spock has categorized the gas and named it Dulcon after the late Lieutenant Dulce Aronica. After consulting with Spock, we have agreed that from all indications, the life forms appeared on the surface shortly after Aronica's death. This would seem to indicate the native life forms are intelligent enough that they realized something in their area caused her death and they thankfully made the decision to return the rest of us to the surface. The official survey report will list the planet as inhabited and not suitable for humanoid colonization.


	7. Stardate 2260.0831 thru 2260.0939

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 31-35

Stardate 2260.0831

If there is anything that I absolutely despise about being a doctor, this is it. Writing out the death certificate for someone far too young. She was only two months shy of what would have been her twenty-fifth birthday. I don't envy Jim's job of writing to her family either. He takes any death of one of our crew hard, but dying because someone was trying to help us but didn't know how? Just seems so pointless.

I finished the report from the medical standpoint for Starfleet and will be monitoring everyone exposed to the gas periodically for any collateral health problems.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0858

Quiet day in Sickbay, so it was a good time to start the research project that Sulu wants me and Spock to participate in. We've collected samples of numerous plants that have healing properties over the course of our mission, but never experimented with the way changes in growing conditions might affect them. It will take awhile but we've agreed that five sets of plants at a time is all that we can reasonably handle with the combination of our other duties and the interruptions that are part and parcel of life on a starship.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0885

The first set of five plants that we're working with are, or rather were, native to Vulcan, so we're going to be taking extra precautions with them. Chilling to think how many plants became extinct when Vulcan was destroyed. Naturally, in the rush to rescue people, plants were the last thing anyone thought of.

The plants we're working with are descendants from a terrarium that Spock's mother made for him years ago as a memento. If it hadn't been for that gift, the majority of these plants would now be extinct as well. Spock has already provided samples for the main core of survivors for cultivation.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0912

Knew the quiet wouldn't last long - another incident in Engineering. I understand the logic in locating the main Sickbay a decent distance from the primary source of explosions, but I've been thinking that I should ask Jim about taking some space closer to Engineering and creating a medical sub-station as a combination first-aid for minor injuries and triage for the more serious ones. I'll go see Scotty and see what he thinks about that. He'd probably have the best idea of where the best place for the sub-station would be.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0939

I had a long chat with Scotty earlier today and he's in full agreement with me about the need for closer emergency services to Engineering. We've even talked about having some detailed first aid classes covering the most common types of injuries to that area - burns and broken limbs are around 75% of the serious injuries with cuts making up nearly all of the rest. I don't think there will be much grumbling over the training either. If any group onboard can see the advantages of advanced first-aid training, it's the engineers.


	8. Stardate 2260.0966 thru 2260.1084

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 36-40

Stardate 2260.0966

Scotty and I decided to approach Jim on the sub-station idea together so that, between us, we could answer any questions or concerns he might have with the project. As it turned out, we didn't have to try very hard to sell him on the idea of the sub-station and he was also agreeable to the advanced first aid training with his only stipulation being that the training be volunteer only. I don't have any objections to that. Not everyone deals well with the sights and smells that are part and parcel with tending to injuries.

* * *

Stardate 2260.0991

The ball is rolling now on the medical sub-station for Engineering. Scotty has a list of areas that could be repurposed and turned it over to Spock, along with my own list of minimal requirements - Jim has him overseeing the project. I'm coordinating with my nurses over the training - one thing we all agree on? I can write up the lessons, but someone else needs to do the teaching for both my sanity and that of the students. Besides, Chapel's of the opinion no one will volunteer if they find out I'm the instructor. Eh, she may have a point.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1021

I'm at a standstill on the sub-station project until some decisions are made regarding which space is going to be used - no point in trying design out the clinic until I know the size and shape I have to work with. Even an extra square foot makes a difference in where I'd place things. Not that there's any lack of other work to keep me occupied. I'd be willing to bet there's one Admiral back at Starfleet Command whose only job is to invent new forms for us to fill out. Does anyone even read all these damn reports?

* * *

Stardate 2260.1047

Sitting by Jim's bedside watching him breathe. Which is a large improvement over a few hours ago when keeping him breathing was a challenge. Took some doing, but finally figured it out. Jim's body is getting too damn creative with his allergies. Turns out that if you take Andor chocolate - which Jim doesn't have a reaction to - and a regular apple, then mix the two? Something about the enzymes of the apple brings out a property of the chocolate that normal digestion doesn't. I swear this kid will be the death of me yet.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1084

Spock and I have pooled our researching talents. Surprise - looks like Jim's allergies aren't to blame for once. Either folks have been lucky enough not to mix fresh apples with Andor chocolates or they died without anyone figuring out what happened to them. Turns out the two together are a toxic combination for most humanoid digestive systems. Spock and I have sent out urgent alerts through the Medical and Science communities along with the drug therapy I used to get Jim through it. Speaking of Jim, he's doing much better - just complaining about a sore throat.


	9. Stardate 2260.1091 thru 2260.1209

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 41-45

Stardate 2260.1091

CMO Log Supplemental - Captain James Kirk recording. Bones, I know you don't plan to listen to your logs until the end of the year, so you won't hear this for quite awhile, but that's okay. It's something that needs saying more than I manage to say it - thanks. You may consider what you do to be the same as any other doctor would, but its not. So, even though you are way, way too attached to your hypospray, there is no-one else I trust to watch over our crew like you do.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1128

There was a quote that described war as long periods of boredom interrupted by moments of sheer terror. I've decided that pretty much sums up a deep space mission as well, the only exception being that with Jim as our Captain, the 'sheer terror' moments are probably more frequent than they would normally be. Right now, the most exciting thing going on is a chess tournament between Chekov and Spock, which means it's a great time to be tending to the plant project. The Vulcan plants are doing remarkably well in a variety of climates.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1165

The chess match is still going on, not that it has been a non-stop match, of course. Chekov and Spock are commonly spending about an hour at a time on the game and are more focused on how many moves they can keep the game going for than in simply winning. Which actually has made it more interesting to watch - at least for me. I'm a decent player, but nowhere near their level, but this is like watching two really good tennis players trying to keep a volley going for as long as they can.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1182

The chess marathon finally came to an end. They didn't beat the longest recorded match, but making the game last 254 moves wasn't too shabby. There's bound to be a rematch.

I'm trying an old experiment on the plants with a little twist, using music on two of the groups of plants - Terran classical on one set and Vulcan classical on the other. Sulu agrees that it will be interesting to see if the plants have equal responses to music or if they react more positively to the music native to their planet.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1209

I told Spock today about playing Vulcan classical music for one of the groups of plants. While he withheld his opinion regarding how he thought the experiment might go, he did mention that his mother frequently talked to her own plants and seemed to have better results in her garden than many of their neighbors did, though that might have been unrelated.

She's one of those people that I wish I could have had an opportunity to meet. Just listening to her talk about her experiences with immersion in the Vulcan culture would have been fascinating.


	10. Stardate 2260.1246 thru 2260.1344

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 46-50

Stardate 2260.1246

It's been one of the 'moments of terror' days. Haven't heard yet if we know who attacked us or why, but my staff and I have been busy taking care of the injuries resulting from it. Thankfully no fatalities, though we did have a few serious injuries. Now that the flow of incoming wounded has slowed down, I'm about to take a medkit to the Bridge and see what types of injuries they're hiding from me. I understand them not wanting to leave their stations, but they still need to be looked at.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1273

None of the injuries to the Bridge personnel were serious, but it seems like everyone was slightly injured except for Jim. I treated everyone at their station without any further incidents, but it appears that we're going to be remaining at a higher alert status while they continue to try and determine who attacked us and why. I'll be keeping a closer eye on the Bridge crew. Any version of 'waiting for the other shoe to drop' can be wearing on a body's nerves, but in a combat situation, it can be particularly stressful.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1298

We aren't any closer to determining who attacked us, but Jim has made the call that we won't learn anything else where we are, so we're continuing on our way. Only difference is we're remaining under a heightened alert status which means more power is being diverted to our shields than usual, so recreational areas that are power hogs are shut down for now. I'm more concerned about everyone being jumpy than that though. I'm already starting to see signs of sleep deprivation in the main Command crew except for Spock.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1317

Long conference today with Jim, Spock and Scotty. End result? We've created a new alert status. We're all in agreement that maintaining the shields at full strength is a necessity, but that's a fact that is only going to be known to a select few of the crew. So far as the rest will know, we'll have returned to normal operations. I think that will help with the sleep problems in the majority of the crew. Scotty even has the power distribution figured out so we can reopen most of the recreational areas.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1344

As hoped, reduced stress levels on the majority of the crew is already showing positive results. Of course, I'm still keeping track of those that know the truth, but that gives me a helluva lot fewer folks to keep a close eye on and I have a few ideas on how to help them out. It will give the physical therapists on my team a workout, but massages when the Bridge crews go off shift should help disperse the tension and let them rest. I'll handle Spock personally - I know a method that should work.


	11. Stardate 2260.1371 thru 2260.1479

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 51-55

Stardate 2260.1371

Got looks from the entire Alpha Bridge crew when they were all ordered to Sickbay as soon as their shift was ended, but I'm very pleased with the results. Jim and Chekov both fell asleep during their massage sessions. Uhura, Sulu and the rest weren't far behind, but managed to get to their rooms before passing out. Spock was a little harder to convince into cooperation, but I talked him into trying it. Between the heated sandbags, the warmed oil infused with Ic'tan leaves and me wearing gloves for the massage part? Mission accomplished.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1398

We've rotated through all the Bridge shifts with positive results. Therapy sessions at shift's end will continue. The therapists involved were told that this is an experimental program and I'm having them keep strict records of vital signs. The one exception is Spock, who told me it was pointless to continue his therapy since his Vulcan metabolism can function on less rest. After a loud discussion, we've come to a compromise - instead of him getting therapy at the end of every shift, he'll get it at the end of every shift rotation.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1435

Just when it was starting to feel like we were moving from exercising caution to being paranoid, we were attacked again. With the shields already being at full power though, we didn't suffer any causalities this time. Even better from our viewpoint, Chekov and Sulu were on duty - those lightning fast mental calculations that kid can make allowed them to fire back and get a piece of our attacker, damaging their craft enough for capture. Turns out that the sector we're in is a home base to a group of raiders. Currently awaiting Starfleet orders.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1452

Jim called the command crew together when he received official word from Starfleet. They'll be sending a small squadron to deal with the raiders and want us to carry on with our primary mission. As to the captured raiders, we're turning them over to the nearest Starbase where Scotty can also see to external repairs to our hull. Speaking of the raiders, some needed medical treatment. None of the injuries were life threatening, so I insisted on only one in Sickbay at a time. Glad I did - every one of them tried to cause trouble.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1479

Again, I'm glad Jim backed my request when I only wanted to deal with treating one raider at a time. The last of the injured proved to be a real handful. Idiot grabbed one of my nurses to try and take her hostage. He picked the wrong nurse - Layali's father has been in Security and he trained all his kids in defending themselves. Layali reacted automatically and broke his arm. I set the bone and put an old-fashioned cast on it while he was still out. That should keep him from getting grabby again.


	12. Stardate 2260.1503 thru 2260.1614

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 56-60

Stardate 2260.1503

Tomorrow we arrive at Starbase 3. I'm not sure what's up, but Scotty and Jim have been nearly inseparable all day. While they could simply be talking about the repairs that need to be done while we're in dock, I sincerely doubt that's it. I suspect Scotty's wanting to change something, which is a pretty safe guess as Scotty always wants to change something.

Spock came in for his massage/relaxation session. He remarked that it was a waste of my time, but I told him it was my time to waste.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1543

Finally arrived at Starbase 3 and can't say I'm disappointed to see the last of the raiders. We'll be here several days for the repairs, so I'm going to be doing some consultation work with the Starbase medical staff as well as taking a little recreation time on the base along with the rest of the crew. Not that anything on here is any better than what we have on the Enterprise, but it's different. Different set-up and different faces is all, but there's something to be said for novelty.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1565

Went on a tour of the Starbase facilities with Jim, Spock and Nyota. When we reached one of the recreational areas, Nyota spotted a game she was familiar with and immediately called for a game with me and her against Jim and Spock. When I tried to beg off, she tugged me to the side and explained that winning the game was about knowing how your opponent would react. She was pretty sure she could anticipate Spock and was even surer I could anticipate Jim. She was right - we creamed them. The looks on their faces? Priceless.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1587

Spent the day in Medical on Starbase 3. The head doctor there, Masika Bashandi, was cold at first until she asked and I explained about the broken arm on the raider. Once that was straightened out, she and I spent hours exchanging notes and helpful information on races that we don't encounter too often. She was fascinated by the story of the cesarean section I performed on a Gorn female and I was equally interested in her experiences with Denobulans. She has a collection of blood samples from various races as well that I found fascinating.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1614

Jim called a command meeting today to explain what Scotty is doing while we're still docked. He and Scotty concluded that the last incident showed plainly that our standard shields need to be stronger which means our emergency shield strength also needed to be increased. Scotty has figured out the power distribution to keep our running shields at the new level and, in the case of a red alert, the extra power will be diverted from the recreational sections that are not used during red alert status anyway. Anything reducing future casualties is fine by me.


	13. Stardate 2260.1641 thru 2260.1751

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 61-65

Stardate 2260.1641

Unless something changes suddenly, we should be leaving the dock tomorrow. I'm really going to miss my daily chats with Masika - very opinionated woman who isn't afraid to voice those opinions. We've agreed to keep swapping notes on new races that we encounter, but that's not the same as talking face to face. Jim's been teasing me about trying to get her transferred to the Enterprise, but that's not something that's going to happen. Masika is happy where she is and has no interest in traipsing about to unexplored worlds.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1669

We've picked up orders and a passenger. The Exeter arrived at the Starbase yesterday with a Commander Rudman. We'll be ferrying him to Starbase 11, where he will be joining the crew of the Defiant. Seems like a lot of skipping around, but I guess that's the only way to get replacement folks out without having to bring the ship back to Earth.

Better make sure everyone's ready for patients. Since the crew got to take shore leave while we were in dock, we're bound to have a few diseases crop up.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1706

Commander Rudman has already worn out his welcome so far as I'm concerned. He's five, maybe six years older than Jim and it's pretty obvious it rankles him that a younger man outranks him. Rudman's been questioning everything Jim does with a tone that implies Jim's doing it all wrong. Jim seems to be letting it go in one ear and out the other so far, but when Spock's eyes met mine, I knew from his slight nod that we have an understanding. We'll both be keeping an eye out.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1733

Interesting isn't quite the word to describe what happened today at the command meeting. I was sitting in the briefing room with Chekov, Nyota and Cupcake . . . dammit, now Jim has me using that nickname.

Back to the subject at hand, Rudman and Spock came in and Rudman blew a fuse, ordering Chekov and myself out of the room, claiming that the two of us being there constituted a security breech. It was at that point that Jim, Scotty and Sulu came in. If Jim heard Rudman, he ignored it and started the meeting - with everyone present.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1751

I found Chekov in my office today. The whole deal with Rudman yesterday still had him unsettled. He was trying to figure out what he'd done wrong to make the Commander dislike him. I told the kid what I believe to be the truth - Rudman's jealous of him like he's jealous of Jim. Chekov's brain combined with his willingness to at least attempt to do whatever he's asked to do? Kid's going to outrank Rudman one day and Rudman knows it. Personally, I hope the thought of that gives Rudman indigestion.


	14. Stardate 2260.1778 thru 2260.1888

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 66 - 70

Stardate 2260.1778

Now I'm going to have to try and explain Rudman to Spock. Rudman is still carping about the meeting - told Spock the only opinions worth wasting time listening to are those from the Bridge crew officers, at least Lieutenants, preferable Lieutenant Commander and above. Being on duty, Spock chose not to argue at the time, but what Rudman said didn't make any sense to him. Since Spock wanted more from me than 'he's an idiot', I invited him to have lunch with me in my office tomorrow so we can discuss this in private.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1816

Lunch with Spock went better than expected. We didn't waste a lot of time talking about Rudman. I told him what I'd told Chekov - that I believe a lot of Rudman's attitude is from jealousy. Spock considered that for a few minutes while eating, then nodded and said that seemed to be inline with what he had personally observed. That was pretty much that and we moved to other subjects. One of those weird things in life? Spock doesn't annoy me half as much when it's just the two of us talking.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1833

Glory hallelujah, we reach Starbase 11 tomorrow and bid farewell to Commander Rudman. Spent way too much time with him today. The Defiant's CMO requested me to do Rudman's physical - their Captain needs him straight to work once he beams aboard. Looking at his records, I discovered I was about five years off on guessing his age - he's eleven years older than Jim, making him older than everyone on our command crew. He's even a couple of months older than Scotty. Explains, but doesn't excuse, him acting like we're all kids.

* * *

Stardate 2260.186

Had a video conference with the Defiant's CMO since we'll be departing the starbase before they arrive. Doctor Faulks was pleased with the results of Rudman's physical but less impressed by the psychological profile. I gave her fair warning about his opinions on who was worth listening to - she'll find out about the rest soon enough. He reminds me of something my grandmother told me once - some folks brighten a room with they enter it, some brighten it when they leave. Have to admit things looked brighter to me when he beamed off.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1888

We depart Starbase 11 later today, but this morning I got the visit I've been half-expecting, half-dreading from Jim. As feared, even though Jim was outwardly letting Rudman's comments and criticisms slide, inwardly he was taking them to heart. We had a long talk and I pointed out that, sure - we have a young crew, but we are far from inexperienced and Jim knows what types information and opinions he likes to have before making a decision. Listening to others and taking diverse ideas into account? That's a strength, not a weakness.

 


	15. Stardate 2260.1915 thru 2260.2025

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 71-75

Stardate 2260.1915

Back to our usual routines, though Spock gave me an odd look when I called him in for his massage session. Said it wasn't really needed since the high-stress time was over. Once he agreed with me that he was in one of the most stressful positions onboard and that was reminded that I also regularly take time with Jim and Scotty to help them decompress, he stopped arguing. Besides, where Spock doesn't drink, this time with him is a decent one-on-one time for us to get to know each other better.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1942

Spock apparently did a whole lot of thinking about our conversation and showed up in my office today. Stood there with his hands behind him like he was reporting to Jim and stated that my job was also among the most stressful onboard. Possibly even the most because I deal with every crewmember on a one-on-one basis, often when Sickbay is the last place they want to be. Couldn't argue that and now? I'll be meeting with Spock once a week to learn some meditation techniques. What the hell? Couldn't hurt, right?

* * *

Stardate 2260.1971

I brought Ensign Terrick back in for a full workup. I'm very pleased to report that following fifty-five days of therapy, he only lost three percent arm mobility on the arm that, for a time, I thought we were going to lose. He's still well within Starfleet standards, so I am releasing him back to full duty status. I couldn't help but notice that he practically ran out of here once I released him. Seemed to act a bit odd, but I guess coming down here every day for therapy had gotten old.

* * *

Stardate 2260.1997

Well, now I know the reason for Ensign Terrick's odd behavior. His first action after being released to full-duty was to file a formal complaint against me demanding that I be charged with Dereliction of Duty and removed from duty until the complaint is reviewed. Jim's just this side of furious and has already gotten clearance for us to head directly to Starbase 15, which is the closest facility with enough officers - and, more importantly, enough high ranking doctors - to be able to judge the complaint. Meanwhile, I'm pretty much confined to quarters.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2025

My life seems to swing between so busy that I barely have time to breathe and nothing at all happening - grandmother used to refer to that as going from flood to drought. Right now, it's drought season, because I can't work on anything related to Medical. You'd think they'd at least let me attempt whittling down some of the never-ending paperwork, but no. Not until the hearing is over.

I've been reviewing the course of treatment in my head. Can't think of a single thing I should have done differently.


	16. Stardate 2260.2052 thru 2260.2161

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log Entries 76-80

Stardate 2260.2052

Someone requested to enter my quarters and I was a bit surprised to find Spock there. He got straight to the point and said since I didn't have any other demands on my time, now would be an excellent opportunity for him to instruct me on meditation techniques. What the hell, I figured it would be better than sitting around second-guessing myself.

It went well, I think. Spock seemed surprised at how quickly I caught on. Not sure if that was a compliment or a veiled insult. I need a translation guide for Vulcan eyebrows.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2079

Still confined to quarters, but at least I don't have restrictions on visitors. It's been odd, but actually nice. I may be talking to more folks than I would be if I were on duty. My nurses all tend to stick a head in to at least say hello on their way on or off shift and a couple of them hang around long enough for a cup of tea or coffee. Most of the Bridge crew filter in and out once a day as well. Chekov even offered chess lessons to help pass time.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2107

We arrive at the Starbase later today and the first part of the hearing will be tomorrow. I think being forced to appear in the dress uniform for this should count on punishing me before the verdict. Keeping a calm front, but to be honest - I want this over. I still don't know what Terrick considered the fault to be with my treatment of his injuries. Guess I find out tomorrow.

I swear I think Jim's more anxious about this whole business than I am. Maybe Spock should try teaching him this meditation stuff next.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2134

Jim, Spock and Nyota accompanied me to the hearing where we finally got to hear the charges. Nyota kept a steady hand on my arm while Spock kept Jim in his seat as we heard my Sickbay being likened to one of the Marquis de Sade's dungeons. Three guesses which role that gave me. The accusations are that I prolonged treatment longer than necessary and withheld needed pain medication. Then we sat there listening as Terrick, Vandermeer and their friends give their statements without being able to offer any rebuttals. Highly unpleasant to say the least.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2161

The hearing panel consists of two doctors - Commander Lanham and Lieutenant Commander Sadek, one nurse - Lieutenant Warren, and two command officers - Captain Hett and Admiral Roban. Today, they're reviewing all logs and medical files on Ensign Terrick - record confidentiality is waived since he technically gave permission for examination of his records when he filed a complaint about his treatment. Tomorrow, they hear my version of events.

Spock and Nyota are spending a lot of time on the computer. I assume it has something to do with Spock's request to present my side at the hearing.


	17. Stardate 2260.2189 thru 2260.2299

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 81-85

Stardate 2260.2189

Now I know what Nyota and Spock were doing. Spock started by saying that since the complaint was regarding Ensign Terrick's treatment, Spock thought it would be useful if the panel had comparable injuries, treatments and outcomes to compare his treatment to. He had located six cases in the Starfleet medical archives similar enough to be viable. The panel agreed and Spock presented his findings - which were pretty detailed. Didn't really surprise me when the panel called another halt to the proceedings to give them a chance to thoroughly go over and compare the records.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2216

Today they took my statement as well as those of the primary nurses and the physical therapist assigned to the case. There was a question about the pain medication - and as I expected, that question came from one of the non-medical officers. I explained that when physical therapy starts, pain medication has to be dialed down. If something is hurting too badly, either things are being pushed too hard or too soon - the patient has to be able to feel the pain so we can make adjustments. I know Commander Lanham understands - she's worked therapy.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2244

Got a message early this morning to report to the hearing room. Seems the panel reached a decision. Which was good because Jim had been close to climbing the walls - I was close to throwing something at him. Nyota and Spock were annoyingly calm.

The verdict was that the accusations were without merit and the charge of Dereliction of Duty was dismissed. The panel also made the call that Ensigns Terrick and Vandermeer would be reassigned to another ship. Not sure I fully agreed with that, but I understood it. From Terrick's reaction, he didn't.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2271

We leave the Starbase tomorrow after the remainder of the paperwork has been finalized. Ensigns Terrick and Vandermeer will be remaining until their next ship picks them up. Not sure which of the medical staff had a talk with him, but Ensign Terrick tracked me down and apologized. Whoever spoke to him apparently spelled out to him what the other outcomes of his injuries could have been. He also found out from other friends that Vandermeer had exaggerated a few things to him. I accepted his apology and hoped he had better luck on his next assignment.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2299

Jim remarked after we got underway that we seemed to be going from pillar to post instead of exploring. I've managed to translate one brow movement, so when I saw it, I knew Spock had never heard the term 'from pillar to post' before. Have to admit that I have no clue where the phrase came from, but I did explain to him that it meant you were forced to go from one place to another. The slightly distracted nod told me that Spock would likely research it. I'll ask him later where it originated.


	18. Stardate 2260.2336 thru 2260.2435

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 86-90

Stardate 2260.2336

The tinkering Scotty and Jim did paid off today. Another of the raider ships attacked us earlier today. As we aren't anywhere near their territory, Jim is of the opinion they were trying to retaliate for the capture of the other raiders, but they were in for a surprise. Their attack didn't penetrate the new level of shielding Scotty put into place, so we didn't suffer any damages or causalities. Not even a bruise to treat in the aftermath.

The disquieting thing? When they figured out they weren't hurting us, they self-destructed.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2353

Jim called an emergency meeting of the command staff. After his review of all the readings taken during the brief skirmish yesterday, Spock has concluded that the vessel that attacked us was, in all likelihood, unmanned. None of us have ever heard of an unmanned ship that packed the kind of firepower we encountered yesterday and Scotty speculated that was the reason for the self-destruction. It was most likely done to keep us from knowing it was unmanned as well as to keep us from getting our hands on whatever technology was used to create it.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2381

There is something to be said for working on a ship with a number of certified geniuses (although some of them might also be certifiable). Chekov's brain went into overdrive. He got together with Uhura reviewing all transmissions that were picked up in the area. Between them, they managed to isolate one of the data bursts sending instructions to that ship. The joint 'think tank' of Chekov, Spock, Uhura and Scotty is working to figure out the coding used - Chekov doesn't think we could block the signal, but we might be able to override it.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2408

Jim joined the brain trust today and dragged me along with him, apparently at Spock's request. When Spock showed me what they were working with, I understood why he asked for me. The information burst that had been sent greatly resembled a DNA strand. We didn't unravel the strand immediately, but with everyone giving their input as we examined it, we finally found the key to unlock it. After that, Chekov and Jim latched on to the internal coding in no time. Next ship they send after us? They're in for a big surprise.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2435

I have folks (translation - Jim and Spock) looking at me like I'm crazy for suggesting the equivalent of a petting zoo onboard, but therapy animals have been a medical tool for centuries. It's not like I'm suggesting a riding stable - though personally, I'd like that. Just suggesting a quiet area where folks could sit and listen to natural sounds and pet on something soft and agreeable. I'll work on it. Folks need more than one way to relax and I don't have enough staff to give everyone onboard regular massage therapy.


	19. Stardate 2260.2463 thru 2260.2572

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 91-95

Stardate 2260.2463

Three starbase stops, so it really isn't a shock that we're encountering a new STD. The real shock is that it wasn't Jim. Since Lieutenant Meyer obviously didn't pay attention to the lecture at the Academy regarding interplanetary men and women that hire out for dubious pursuits, he is now in possession of body parts tinted a shade that I can only describe as neon orange.

Running tests currently to see what effect this is having on him beyond discoloration. He's denying 'sharing' with anyone onboard - he'd best be being truthful.

* * *

Stardate 2260.249

Test results came back with both good and bad news for Lieutenant Meyer. Regarding his general health, the STD he picked up is one I can get out of his system with a course of treatment that will only take a couple of days. On the bad news side? From all indications, the neon orange coloration is going to be permanent. And what was his main concern? How he would be able to get intimate with another woman in the future with his privates looking that way. I wonder if he and Jim might be distant cousins?

* * *

Stardate 2260.2517

The different varieties of Vulcan plant seedlings have gotten large enough now to start telling with environments are working and which are a bust. Some of the climate/soil/environment combinations actually worked a little too well - the plants grew too quickly and are spindly. From this point, we're narrowing it down to the five combinations that have shown the most promising results. One of the top five is the one that combined mild Vulcan temperatures, speaking to the plants and playing Vulcan music. Proves Spock's mother was definitely onto something with her gardening style.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2545

Full couple of days ahead. Standard checkup time for the Engineering staff which means updating any vaccinations that need it, following up on injuries that happened since their last checkup, etc. I'm breaking their checkups into two parts so that we don't disrupt their downtime any more than strictly. First visit post-shift, I'm having my people just take the samples we need to run their health diagnostics. Next visit, we'll already have the test results and can do the remainder of the exams. Less sitting around and awaiting should make everyone happier.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2572

Praise the Lord and pass the bourbon - Engineering section's annual exams are completed. We only received complaints from the folks that always complain about any hint of having to come to Sickbay, which means splitting the exam into two parts worked well for everyone from the patients to the lab techs, so that's going to be a permanent change in our standard procedures. I probably should do the Bridge crew next. Small department, but the very devil to corner - especially one Captain who shall remain nameless. Chapel suggested stocking lollipops - she might be onto something.


	20. Stardate 2260.260 thru 2260.2709

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 96-100

Stardate 2260.260

Jim has figured out Spock's latest log encryption and was acting indignant about the suggestion that he might be easier to persuade into his annual exams with a lollipop lure. Followed by him asking if I really was going to use them and, if so, what flavor. What the hell - I told him he'd have to show up for his appointment if he wanted to know. It should probably worry me that it looks like he might actually come out of pure curiosity alone, but frankly? I take my victories when and how I can.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2627

It took a little work, but it was worth it. Jim came with the rest of the Bridge crew for the first part of their annual physical and parked himself on one of the biobeds, demanding a lollipop before we continued - Sulu and Chekov were snickering, Uhura was rolling her eyes and Spock was probably considering a transfer. The expression of all of their faces when I pulled out a sucker and offered it to Jim? Perfect, especially Jim's. He seemed to enjoy it, so I should be able to get him back for part two.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2654

Finished up part two of the Bridge crew annual exams and had lollipops ready for one and all. Yes, including Spock. I don't know why they all seemed so shocked that I knew their favorite flavors. I have access to their meal records, for pity's sake. Not exactly difficult to figure out which fruits and juices are the main ones that they request.

The only one that I really had to talk into tasting them was Spock. Maybe lollipops aren't considered logical - or he thought I was pulling a trick. Which technically? I am.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2681

Today was pretty amusing. Spock asked to meet me in my office, apparently with the intent of scolding me about those lollipops when I'm the one always telling Jim to lay off the junk food. He looked genuinely surprised (translation : he lifted an eyebrow) when I started laughing. While I caught my breath, I pulled up the ingredients that went into those suckers and passed the PADD over. He re-read it twice and I do believe he was almost tempted to laugh himself when he figured out that the lollipops are multi-vitamins in disguise.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2709

So much for trying to get the annual physicals all done. I've been forewarned that I'm going to be part of a landing party again tomorrow. Joy. I begin to wonder if Jim views me like some sort of good luck charm. If so, I think I might need to look into getting him a four leaf clover. Still, I have to admit an equal part of excitement to go along with the dread. It's not that new place and species don't intrigue me - it's how we've got to get there.


	21. Stardate 2260.2736 thru 2260.2846

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 101-105

Stardate 2260.2736

I can let that breath I've been holding back out. The landing party mission went without even the slightest hitch. Which is good, because now I have something, or rather someone, to keep an eye on - namely Spock. He's acting . . . well, for the lack of a better word? Antsy. I wondered if maybe it was just me, but I saw Nyota give him a confused glance, so she's noticed something too. Wish this had started a few days sooner - I could have used the annual exam as an excuse to call him to Sickbay.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2764

Spock knows I noticed something. He's taking extreme pains to make sure I'm never alone with him to ask any questions. I'm slightly torn. On one hand, I respect everyone's right to privacy. On the other hand, I'm legally and morally responsible for the wellbeing of every individual onboard.

After considerable thought, I'm taking a step I didn't think I'd ever take. I've sent a private message to the Ambassador. All I've asked is for him to tell me if I should be concerned or butt out.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2791

When I received word that a classified communication was coming in for me, I knew two things before I answered. One - it was going to be the Ambassador. Two - he wasn't going to tell me that there was nothing to worry about. Unfortunately, I was right on both points. He and I had a long talk, but considering I know that eventually Jim is going to hack into my log again, I won't mention here what we talked about. End result? Spock and I need to have a long talk in the very near future.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2818

It took some doing, but I finally caught Spock outside of his quarters, with his PADD in hand. Problem was telling him what I know. There wasn't a chance in Hell that he would invite me inside and I didn't want to blurt his business all over the ship. I finally just said I had spoken with the Ambassador and was sorry to hear about T'Pring.

I heard a crack and realized he'd snapped the PADD in his hands. I didn't try to stop him when he entered and locked the door.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2846

Took me off-guard when I started to enter my quarters and got shoved inside hard enough that I ended up on the floor. As suspected, when I managed to look toward the door, it was closed and Spock was in front of it. At least he was apologetic about how hard he'd shoved me, though he gave me a dirty look when I asked if he was experiencing a lot of control issues lately. Spock then demanded to know who knew other than me. I told him only the Ambassador. He calmed considerably after that.

 

 


	22. Stardate 2260.2873 thru 2260.2983

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 106 - 110

Stardate 2260.2873

I am not ashamed to admit that it took me a day to get up the nerve to tell Spock that, even though I won't say anything to Jim, that he needed to. There's no point in even pretending that this isn't going to affect his performance of his duties. Thankfully, he stuck to glowering at me and didn't flat out attack me - which I will admit was a worry. I've been able to give Spock some relief with hormone therapy, but that will only do so much good for so long.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2901

To my relief, after meditation, Spock agreed with me that Jim needed to be told - sooner rather than later. To my surprise, Spock asked me to accompany him and to be present when he tells him. Jim has a full schedule today, but Spock's already arranged a meeting for tomorrow. Bet Jim is dying of curiosity. Also bet that whatever he thinks is going on isn't anywhere near the truth of the matter.

I'm consulting as discretely as I can, but it looks like we'll have to improvise and hope for the best.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2928

As I expected, Jim's first inclination was to treat this whole problem as a joke, but to his credit, it didn't take him more than a minute of two to realize that joking about something like this wasn't in the range of my sense of humor and that Spock has no discernible sense of humor. For my part, I'm going to be consulting with the Ambassador again tomorrow. Spock, and probably Jim, will be with me. I have a gut feeling that the surviving Vulcan hierarchy isn't going to be very helpful.

* * *

Stardate 2260.2955

As I feared, the Vulcan council is being cruel - in their normal damned cold logical way. There are now fewer Vulcan females than males and since Spock's father is - as they phrased it - 'still viable', they see no logic in 'wasting' the remaining genetic material on less than a pure Vulcan. If that wasn't bad enough, they asked the Ambassador to relay that charming message. Did it even dawn on those so-called geniuses that they basically insulted the man to his face and then asked him to pass it on to his younger counterpart?

* * *

Stardate 2260.2983

Been up all night talking with the Ambassador. The problem is that to satisfy the requirements to get Spock's body back to normal is that both a mental and physical connection are required. I asked the Ambassador if the mental connection had to be with the same person as the physical connection because, while Nyota is willing to help out, neither she nor Spock are ready for marriage. He froze and I thought for a second I had broken him, but then he gave that little half-smile of his. Maybe we found a biological loophole.


	23. Stardate 2260.3011 thru 2260.3120

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 111-115

Stardate 2260.3011

Not going into details because of privacy issues, but I hope that by this time tomorrow, we won't have to be worried about this thing possible being fatal for Spock. It's going to be a combined effort with me, Jim, Nyota and the Ambassador. Maybe by the time another seven years rolls along, we'll have been able to figure out something a lot less complicated. No sense even worrying about that until we know if what we have planned will work. The Ambassador seems positive, so that gives me hope everything will work out.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3038

Both the Ambassador and Spock assure me that our gamble worked. What really assures me is that the tricorder readings on Spock are rapidly decreasing to what his normal healthy levels are. This whole episode has given me a good deal more respect for Spock and a great deal less respect for the current Vulcan council.

Jim made the mistake of asking the Ambassador if it was a lot less complicated back when he had the same problem. That crazy Romulan might have changed a lot of things, but not Jim's capacity to get into trouble.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3066

One thing hasn't returned to normal on Spock - the way he's acting around those of us that were involved. I sure as hell can't handle this for the remainder of our mission. Thing is, will saying something to Spock make it worse or get things back to normal? Jim's all for ignoring it for a little longer to see if Spock settles back down on his own. I suppose giving it a little longer won't hurt anything - at least not so long as a mission doesn't crop up in the meantime.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3093

I reached my limit with Spock today. I disagreed with something he said and, instead of arguing back, he 'deferred to my judgment'. I dragged him into my office right then and there to talk. I don't recall everything I talked about, but the upshot of it was that he was helped out of an awkward situation by his friends and dammit, that's nothing to fret over. Long as our mission is, he's likely to have to do the same for us someday. He didn't say much, but he did leave looking thoughtful.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3120

Spock came to see me in my office today. Out of everything I said yesterday, the one thing that threw him? Me saying that we were friends. He flat out stated that he didn't think I would consider him such, especially after the incident with Jim and that hunk of ice he stranded him on. I told him that, yes - I might not like or approve of some of the things he's done, but that doesn't mean I don't consider him a friend. He wandered off after that looking thoughtful again. Infuriating hobgoblin.

 


	24. Stardate 2260.3148 thru 2260.3257

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 116-120

Stardate 2260.3148

Should have expected Spock would come back with more questions - seems to need to categorize things before accepting them. I asked Spock if he had any doubts that Jim and I were friends. Nope, no doubts about that. Next, I asked Spock who I yell at and get frustrated with more - him or Jim. No hesitation - Jim. Then I pointed out that, logically, if disagreeing meant I couldn't be friends with someone, Jim would be less likely to be my friend than him.

At least Spock looked puzzled instead of thoughtful when he left this time.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3175

Yep - Spock was back again today. He had been considering what I said and wondered why, if Jim frustrates me as much as he seems to (and he does), I consider him to be my friend. I looked Spock straight in the eyes and asked him the same question. That eyebrow of his rose slightly before he gave a short nod to concede to my point, then said that we share a rather illogical fondness for Jim. I pointed out that proves that we have at least one thing in common and today? Spock left looking amused.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3203

Hallelujah - things are back to normal. Well, as normal as they can get when you're stuck in the black inside a tin box filled with a few hundred other folks insane enough to be here. Spock said something he knew would get a rise out of me - we went at it hammer and tongs. Some folks were even debating calling in Jim to separate us. Please - as if either of us need to resort to anything as mundane as physical conflict. **Some** of us have the right weapons for a battle of wits. It was glorious.

* * *

Stardate 2260.323

I cannot believe that Spock and I were called up on the carpet over yesterday. It was all I could do to keep a straight face at the blank, yet slightly puzzled, expression Spock donned as Jim reprimanded us about our 'public fight'. Then Spock blandly stated that it was obvious some of our crew were unschooled in the 'art' of rigorous debate' and that, should the Captain like, Spock would be willing to instruct them in the technique to prevent future misunderstandings.

Jim's jaw literally dropped open when I wholeheartedly agree with everything Spock said.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3257

Spock invited me to lunch today. He said it was to assist in convincing the crew that we weren't about to kill one another, but I think it's more of a case of both of us testing out our new footing.

It was kind of nice to eat with someone that I didn't have to fuss at about eating the occasional vegetable and stopping after one dessert. We also discovered we have some non-science likes in common - his mother was fan of Charles Dickens and we ended up talking about our favorite stories.


	25. Stardate 2260.3285 thru 2260.3394

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 121-125

Stardate 2260.3285

I am a grown man. A grown divorced man enlisted in Starfleet. So why does my life resemble high school again? Two days ago, Jim was fussing at Spock and me about fighting in public. Today? His feelings seem to be wounded because Spock and I had an amiable lunch together and didn't invite him to join us. Infant. What's next? Fine. All three of us will have lunch together tomorrow.

Speaking of lunch, wonder if Spock might be agreeable to helping me convince Jim that vegetables weren't invented by Romulans to poison him?

* * *

Stardate 2260.3312

Almost choked on my lunch today. Jim got pouty when I sided with Spock over a regulation we were discussing. Spock steepled his fingers, looked Jim right in the eye and said 'You dislike it when the Doctor and I disagree, but seem equally displeased when we agree. If you could possible give us a detailed account of how you would prefer us to interact, perhaps we will be able to adjust to suit your needs.'

I was wrong - Spock has both a wicked sense of humor and a decent amount of snark under all that logic.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3339

Today was my weekly breakfast with Nyota and Christine. Those two gals? They hear the best gossip on the whole ship. While I don't tend to gossip myself, my grandmother taught me the value of listening to it when I was about knee-high. She also taught me that trying to stop gossip is like trying to stop the wind. Well, if you can't stop it, you need to keep an eye on it. Just like the wind, the mild stuff will simply ruffle hair and move on, but the hard stuff can do damage.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3367

Today, met with Chekov and Scotty. We try to get together about once a week in non-crisis times, partly to teach Pavel the finer points of some of the more popular card games they play on starbases. The other part? Whatever gossip misses Christine and Nyota seems to get picked up by either Scotty or Pavel. Not that men tend to call it gossip. No, we tend to use phrases like 'sitting around, shooting the shit' like they said back in my grandfather's day.

Nothing new making the rounds worth mentioning to Jim or Spock.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3394

Should have known things were too quiet. Some of the crew decided to share a bottle purchased at the last starbase. Unfortunately, none of them knew the language well enough to read the label that warned of serious side effects for individuals with Denobulan blood. Yes, I'd say slipping into a psychotic rage counts as a serious side effect.

Fortunately, the young lady was able to be restrained by Security without too much damage given or taken, but I've got fourteen folks in various stages of recovery. Time for another lecture about drinking unknown substances.


	26. Stardate 2260.3421 thru 2260.3529

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 126-130

Stardate 2260.3421

Jim thought I was rushing the lectures a bit, but I argued that talking to the crew about the necessity of knowing what they were about to drink/eat/put into their body might sink in a little better with a livid example in front of them. Cupcake has agreed to help me out and even asked me to leave his bruises untended until after - which I agreed to. It's not only the possible damage to themselves that I want the crew to think about, but what they might unintentionally do to their friends and crewmates.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3448

Cupcake . . . dammit, Jim - **Hendorff** brought up something during the 'know what you're drinking' lecture that I hadn't considered. There are folks with long standing grudges against some other races and if they spot one, they might deliberately sell them something that would affect them badly.

Lieutenant Lusis had been lucky to have been drinking with friends who saw her reaction and told Security what had happened. Since Security knew she was in an altered mental state, they didn't use excessive force - things might have ended a lot worse if she'd been drinking alone.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3475

Going to be a long shift today. I slept, but I didn't seem to get any rest. In fact, I woke up as tired as if I'd spent a full shift in surgery. Not got an appetite either. Well, this is one of those days that supplements are for. I don't approve of folks that try to bypass all their meals in favor of them because the human body wasn't designed for that, but every now and again they at least make sure the body's has enough vital nutrients to keep going.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3502

I don't get it. I was literally falling asleep on my feet by the time I got off of my shift yesterday. I didn't even take time to get anything to eat - barely took time to pull off my uniform. Crawled into my bed and passed out. For all the good it did me. So far as I know, I slept without waking for over twelve hours and don't feel like I got twelve minutes worth. I've already given Chapel the heads up that I'm less than 100% - hell, more like 50%.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3529

Not sure whether to be bemused or annoyed as hell that Jim and Spock decided that they needed 'have a talk' with me about getting proper sleep. Going for bemused - too damn tired to get mad. Told them I **had** been sleeping, just not resting.

Spock asked if I'd ever had any incidents with sleepwalking, which I never have. To make sure, they want to watch me when I go to bed tonight. Hell, I'm tired enough to try anything - if they aren't going to be bored to death watching me sleeping, why not?


	27. Stardate 2260.3556 thru 2260.3664

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 131-135

Stardate 2260.3556

I knew it was going to be something bad when I woke up to both Jim and Spock staring at me like I'd grown another head overnight. If I hadn't been too exhausted to move, I'd have shooed them both off, but what they had to say has got me more than a little spooked.

They confirmed that I went to bed and stayed there, but Spock thought to make use of a tricorder and according to it? Going strictly by the readings, I was wide awake. No drugs in my system, so how?

* * *

Stardate 2260.3583

Woke up with a headache straight from Hell to find Jim and Spock hovering. Apparently on their second night of watching me, Spock started seeing some readings that bothered him and they weren't able to wake me. Spock started to go into an explanation of what happened, but I held my hand up and asked if I should be able to get some rest finally. When Spock said yes, I told him to tell me after I woke back up and ordered the lights off. Last thing I heard was Jim snickering in the background. Infant.

* * *

Stardate 2260.361

I don't have the words to say how much better I felt after I woke up feeling rested. Jim and Spock had apparently kept watch over me again. Or rather Spock did. When I woke up, Jim was snoring.

While Jim was snoozing, Spock told me the basics of what happened. Apparently, someone managed to establish a mental connection and had me working on a medical problem during my sleep time. Before Spock got to any details, an emergency alert came in from Sickbay. Spock's promised to meet me later to tell me the rest.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3637

The surgery took an entire shift - when I got back to my office to collapse into a chair, Spock was waiting on me.

The fact that Spock started by apologizing was not comforting, but I understand why Jim asked him to try that mind voodoo stuff. Turned out to be a good thing that he did. While passing through that uncharted area, I drew the attention of a telepathic race stronger than any Spock has ever encountered before. Apparently I'll be 'meeting' them on a more aware level later. After I've had some more rest.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3664

I wake up - Jim and Spock are waiting. Them watching me sleep is now officially creepy.

The aliens Spock mentioned earlier, a group calling themselves Talosians, have evolved to a point where they do almost everything mentally and, in the process, they've forgotten how to do a lot of things physically. Which didn't cause them much trouble until a ship crashed on their planet and unleashed a disease that is now threatening their survival. Jim asked me if I'll agree to try and help them out. Like I could refuse and live with myself.


	28. Stardate 2260.3691 thru 2260.3799

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 136-140

Stardate 2260.3691

Spock and I have been excused from normal duty rotation while we aid the Talosians with their medical emergency.

I'm uneasy about this whole process. Spock will meld with my mind and then the two of us will be speaking mentally with the Talosians. Stage one will be learning what we can about the anatomy of their races. Stage two will be figuring out what the disease is and the final stage will be figuring out to eradicate the disease without causing more harm than good. This is easily the strangest consultation I've ever attempted.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3718

The Talosians are some seriously scary individuals. If Spock hadn't been with me and I hadn't known for sure where my body was? I would have sworn we were sitting in a room with them discussing their health issues. How to describe the way they live? Their world is a wasteland and they create elaborate illusions - literally living in a world of imagination. Their trouble is that the sickness interferes with their ability to concentrate. I have a couple of ideas - I'll know more when I can view the survivor of the crash tomorrow.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3745

When we met with the Talosians today, we met the crash survivor - a young human female named Vina - explains why they were on the lookout for a human doctor.

Wish I could have some diagnostic tools with me. I had to settle for asking her a variety of questions - what the ship she'd been on was called, if they'd visited any other worlds before the crash, had anyone onboard been ill recently that she knew of, what kind of symptoms had she felt - all for the sake of trying to piece together a puzzle blindfolded.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3772

Took the day for rest and research. I had just woken up when Spock requested to speak with me to verify that Vina had said that the SS Columbia was the name of the ship that crashed. I wasn't sure why was so important until he told me the SS Columbia had disappeared in 2236 - 24 years ago. Vina told me she was 32, but unless she was a child when they crashed, I was lied to. I need the truth if I'm going to have any chance of figuring out what's going on.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3799

The Talosians admitted that they keep Vina's appearance to the age she was when they found her - instead of being my age, she's actually closer to my mom's age. No way the disease came from her since they've been exposed to her for years.

Come to think of it, for folks that are supposed to be worried about how a disease is affecting them, they don't seem too terribly concerned about my progress, or rather, my lack thereof. Something here stinks worse than that mash Scotty ferments to use in his still.


	29. Stardate 2260.3826 thru 2260.3934

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 141-145

Stardate 2260.3826

Still not sure how it happened, but I'm on Talos Four. Inside a cell. Guess that means my earlier bad feelings have been confirmed. Wouldn't have minded being wrong for once.

Glad I had my tricorder with me - recording this gives me something to do besides pacing. No clue if I'm the only one off the Enterprise down here or what they want. One thing I have noticed is that the Talosians don't seem to be used to being scowled at. They get a really puzzled expression whenever they look in on me.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3863

Talosians gave me a protein slurry - disgusting is a generous description - then told me their plans. They have other races that they 'keep', but when Vina crashed here, they got fixated on humans. After 'looking over' our crew - disturbing thought - they decided I was the best candidate for their 'breeding' program because I know how to assist in a birthing and can take care of the health of group. They seem to be of the opinion that I should be thrilled. There are many adjectives to describe how I'm feeling - thrilled isn't one of them.

* * *

Stardate 2260.388

While I was sleeping, Vina was added to my cell. I had suspicions about her - my tricorder confirmed them. Then the Talolsians started a series of illusions that I suppose were meant to encourage us to 'procreate', changing everything from the appearance of our surroundings to how Vina looked.

When I was finally able to get their attention, I informed them their plans have a basic flaw. They can make Vina look any age they please - maybe they can even make her believe she's thirty-two, but her body knows better. She's past menopause - infertile.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3907

I need off this rock and away from the Talosians now. The main one that deals with me - the zookeeper, I guess - brought me more of the protein muck of theirs and asked me about the reproductive status of the females aboard the Enterprise. The thought of them trapping someone else like I was? I saw red.

I'm not sure which of us was more shocked when I ended up with my hands around his neck. I came to my senses and shoved him away from me, cussing him more than I've ever cussed anyone.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3934

Not sure if I should be amused or insulted. The Talosians have concluded that if a human healer is prone to violence over captivity, other humans would be even worse. Therefore, they've decided that we're too dangerous a race for them to keep for breeding. They've been keeping the Enterprise away with their illusions, but are stopping them to allow the ship close enough to teleport me back aboard tomorrow.

I invited Vina to come, but she's as addicted to her illusionary life as the Talosians are. She wants to stay with them.


	30. Stardate 2260.3961 thru 2260.4069

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 146-150

Stardate 2260.3961

Back aboard the Enterprise. Only things I seem to have lost while I was gone was a little weight, a lot of sleep and what little peace of mind I used to have.

Spock sounded almost apologetic when he requested my permission to meld with me to ensure that the Talosians didn't cause any injuries. It was kind of nice to have someone asking before barging in, so I agreed. I could tell from the way his back got stiffer that there were things Spock didn't approve of, but no real damage. Just nightmare fodder.

* * *

Stardate 2260.3988

I should learn to never assume something is over. For whatever twisted reasons, the Talosians decided to contact me mentally one more time. Maybe they were trying to show me what I was missing out on. Apparently Vina had really wanted a family. I was shown a scene of her and 'me' as we were cooing over a baby. Except I knew that was a 56 year old woman surrounded by nothing but solid looking illusions.

Not sure how they knew, but Spock and Jim got to my quarters while I was still puking my guts out.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4015

After that last stunt from the Talosians, Spock wanted to see if there was any remaining mental connection and, if so, remove it. Fine by me. While he was checking, I was talking with Jim. Then it suddenly dawned on me that I not only trusted Spock, I was thinking about him as a friend. A close one.

Spock spoke up and said 'I have had similar thoughts. It was as unexpected a development to me as to you'. Of course Jim started asking what we were talking about. Told him to mind his own business. Infant.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4042

Jim sent a classified message to Starfleet detailing our encounter with the Talosians. The emphasis was on how they manipulated our ship by making the crewmembers think they were doing one thing when they were, in fact, doing something else. For instance, Spock and I figured out that I was under the impression that I was headed to the lab to check on our plants but actually went to the transporter room. Scotty thought he was running a diagnostic when he was beaming me to them. Spooky to think what else they might have made us do.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4069

After consulting with Sulu and Spock, we're officially ending the experiments on the Vulcan plants. We narrowed down the list to three sets of conditions that yield the optimal combinations of a healthy plant and good output of seed, fruit and/or tubers. Trying to pick between the three was mostly splitting hairs, so we'll send the recommendations as a set and those doing the actual care at the new colony can pick whichever method suits their own preferences best.

Nice to be able to provide the colony with a living part of their past.


	31. Stardate 2260.4096 thru 2260.4204

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 151-155

Stardate 2260.4096

Sitting by Scotty's bedside. One of those freak engineering accidents. Scotty must have seen a warning sign and got his junior personnel out, but didn't make it all the way out himself before the blast. Still, his instincts kept a bad situation from becoming horrific and his injuries are ones that a combination of myself and time can heal.

Spock ventured the opinion that I get too emotionally attached, but I don't see that changing. I've been treated by emotionally distant doctors a time or two. Can't say I cared for it.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4123

Scotty's obviously feeling better - I intercepted Keenser trying to sneak him a bottle. They both gave me a bad imitation of an innocent look when I confiscated it and told them that booze isn't part of the liquid diet Scotty's currently on. I did give him the good news that if he managed to be a better patient than Jim - which really isn't that hard - he'll be starting back on solid food tomorrow and will be back up to small quantities of his normal beverage of choice about three days after that.

* * *

Stardate 2260.415

Seems that a bored engineer is a productive engineer. While mending, Scotty came up with two improvements for the biobeds that I really want to get Jim's approval on. One - adding a storage cell to the beds so that if the main power goes during an emergency, each biobed can keep its own functions running for up to thirty hours without pulling on auxiliary power. Two - a change to the framework similar to the way they construct homes in earthquake prone areas. That would keep patients from getting jostled as badly if we take a hit.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4177

Releasing Scotty to limited duty - with orders that he's not to pick up anything heavier than his PADD for the next two days. Technically, I could already release him to full duty, but I prefer easing him back in gradually and give his new skin time to stretch without being strained. He's not arguing - says it will give him time to catch up on some technical articles and work up a few biobed designs. Considering I've been known to read up on new surgical techniques on my off-time, who am I to judge?

* * *

Stardate 2260.4204

Reminder to self - Scotty has trouble with the concept of limited duty. He's already turned in a preliminary set of schematics for revising the biobeds to Jim and I found evidence of about half a dozen other projects he's working on. At least he obeyed the part about no heavy lifting, but limited duty also means half days and most definitely means no overtime. You'd think that I wouldn't have to spell that out to a grown man. Well, a grown man other than Jim. Jim likes being the exception to the rules.


	32. Stardate 2260.4231 thru 2260.4339

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 156-160

Stardate 2260.4231

I had high hopes that Jim might set a new record for time between Sickbay visits. No such luck. He got curious about some of the things Spock eats and tried a Vulcan dish. Guess who's allergic to the Vulcan version of mint? At least the reaction was a fairly mild one - sneezing and puffy eyes. Even luckier, one of the antihistamines that he can take helped with the symptoms.

While he was here, Jim said he was giving Scotty the green-light to make the alterations, but that he'd leave the details to us.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4258

To his great delight, I told Scotty that if he rests today, I will release him back to full duty status at the start of his next shift. I can understand it, really. Whenever I have to be away from Sickbay for very long, I start worrying about things not being put where they should be and a million other little details. That's probably one of the reasons Scotty and I get along so well - we don't understand the details of each other's work, but we both are very personally invested in our departments.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4285

Jim got a message from Starfleet. After reviewing the reports, they agreed with Jim's assessment that further contact with the Talosians is dangerous. That's putting it mildly, but I guess it's harder to understand without seeing what I saw. At best, the Talosians saw Vina and me as pets to be trained. Don't do what they wanted - punishment. Do what they wanted - good boy, here's a treat.

Talos IV is banned from contact now under General Order 7, which I'm told carries a death-penalty if violated. Seems a tad extreme.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4312

Had lunch with Soctty today. We'll doing that daily while we finalize plans for upgrading the biobeds. While alterations are being done, there are a couple of things I'd like adjusted as well, so we're going to make the two biobeds going into the new medical sub-station our test models. That will give us an idea how long it will take to get the alterations done and the units back in working order before we move to the ones in the main Sickbay. I'm almost as excited as Scotty to get started.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4339

It was technically Scotty's day off, but we met for lunch and then spent about two hours afterward with him taking notes while I told him about what I'd like to have added to the biobed systems. Nothing drastic, just little things that we have to do between patients that would save time if those functions were automated. On an average day, that extra time wouldn't make much difference, but I remember all too well the chaos when we had more wounded than we had beds to accommodate them. Times like those, seconds matter.


	33. Stardate 2260.4366 thru 2260.4474

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 161-165

Stardate 2260.4366

We now have an officially designated location for the medical sub-station. Fortunately, no emergencies in either Sickbay or Engineering, which meant Scotty and I were able to take the time to layout how all the equipment and storage will be positioned there. I'm treating it like a clinic - it needs to be supplied well enough to take care of basic injuries without the need to send to the main Sickbay for gear. I sincerely hope Sickbay never takes another hit like the one that killed Doctor Puri, but best to prepare for the worst case.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4393

We placed the first piece of equipment into the sub-station today and Scotty insisted we mark it with all due ceremony - which, to no-one's surprise, involved the use of alcoholic beverage. Couldn't argue with Scotty's reasoning that it never hurts to court good luck. He's of the opinion that we should be up and running within a month's time. Barring emergencies taking precedence, of course.

Jim seems to be highly amused by the two of us. I guess he's never seen me get this involved in a project before.

* * *

Stardate 2260.442

Another new planet , another landing party, another near disaster. The planet we beamed down to wanted to meet with Federation representatives, but didn't warn us about violent reactions to certain body characteristics - like pointed ears. Spock was attacked without warning and the rest of us injured trying to shield him from further attacks. His green blood turned out to be the saving grace. Green is a sacred color there, so his green blood was taken as proof Spock wasn't hostile. Thankfully that meant they allowed me to treat his wounds without continuing to attack us.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4447

Spock's still in Sickbay, but only because I want him under observation for a few more hours to make sure his blood counts are closer to normal. While I was checking his readings, couldn't help but notice he was staring at me, so I asked him if there was a problem. So help me, he was laying there trying to figure out why we had blocked the attacks on him by taking the blows ourselves. Damn, no wonder the man acts so aloof. Seems he's never really had anyone else to have his back.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4474

I released Spock from Sickbay and walked him back to his quarters so that we could chat. I'm not sure how successful I was at getting across what I wanted to, but I tried to explain that I didn't step into the line of fire down there because he was my responsibility and I'd bet my last bottle of bourbon that Jim didn't either. We did it because he is our friend.

Spock was silent, so I left him to absorb that at his own rate. Maybe I should sic Jim on him.


	34. Stardate 2260.4501 thru 2260.4609

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 166-170

Stardate 2260.4501

Spock asked if he could join me at breakfast this morning. Certainly didn't bother me. Jim usually avoids me at breakfast as I tend to comment on his food choices.

After a minute or two, Spock expressed his curiosity over my meal, which happened to be biscuits with pepper gravy, cheese grits and a bowl of fruit. The gravy and grits? Not as good as back home, but not half bad for replicator food. I offered him a taste after assuring him there was no meat in any of it. I might have another grits convert.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4528

A full day working with Scotty on the sub-station. Instead of moving a biobed from the main Sickbay, Scotty said since the frame was going to be different, it would actually be easier for him to do it from scratch rather than to take the time to modify the existing frame, though he will eventually have to modify the already existing units. Still, that means I'll still have the full number of beds in Sickbay. There have been times that two extra beds would have been mighty handy. Project's going smoothly - knock on wood.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4555

Scotty deserves his reputation as a miracle worker. He has the basic framework for the first of the new biobeds completed and demonstrated to me how the improvements will allow the top of the biobed to remain stable even if a jolt goes through the deck plates. Have to admit that I'm impressed. Jolts, emergency situations and causalities all seem to come together and the less jolts the patients get, the better for their recovery. I know this will eventually get tested under fire and if it works the way we think it will? Lives will be saved.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4582

I had meetings today with my staff regarding how we're going to man the sub-station. I made sure they were all fully aware that even though that clinic might be dead most of the time, when something happens in Engineering, it's likely to be messy and serious. Anyone that will be stationed there will have to be well-versed in broken bones, concussions and burns, so I'll be holding training sessions for those interested . Currently, we have enough folks willing to pull shifts there that we won't have to pull anyone else.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4609

Scotty is like a dog with a bone when he has a project. The first new model biobed will be ready to test tomorrow. Of course, we can't check how well the stabilization part works, but knowing our luck, a situation that tests that won't be too far down the line. If the bed performs the other functions correctly, I'll be starting manning here next week. No need to wait for both beds before making use of the space.

Next shore leave, I've already promised Scotty - his choice of bar, my credit chip.


	35. Stardate 2260.4636 thru 2260.4744

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 171-175

Stardate 2260.4636

Quiet day in Sickbay, so today was a perfect time to take the staff in small groups and acquaint them with the sub-station. After all, even the ones not actually working there should know where it is and what it has available. The biobed passed all tests with flying colors, so I was also able to demonstrate the new additions to everyone as well. I was glad to see that they all saw the advantages of the upgrades. Scotty's little heart should be nice and warm with all the praise my staff heaped on him.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4663

Nothing in Sickbay my staff couldn't handle, so when Spock requested me as another pair of hands in an experiment, I said sure. I did ask why he didn't just use one of his folks and he said he needed to be sure that he was coordinating with a pair of hands as steady as his own. Not exactly sure what would have gone wrong if we hadn't kept our hands steady, but that's a moot point now. Everything went well, so I'll probably be happier not knowing the 'what if' part.

* * *

Stardate 2260.469

Met Jim and Spock for breakfast and found that Spock has been experimenting with variations of fixing grits. He offered to let me try his most recent combination, which was pretty damn tasty. The addition was favinit butter, which is made from one of those Vulcan plants we experimented on that looks a lot of an orchid.

Jim kind of huddled protectively around his stack of pancakes and looked at us like we were both crazy when we both made that the main part of our breakfast. Heaven help me, I have Peter Pan for a captain.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4717

There are some incredibly intelligent people on this ship. My only wish is that more of them had a little common sense to go along with all that intelligence. I spent an hour in surgery rushing to save the life of an ensign who swallowed, of all things, a Benzar sweet that isn't supposed to be swallowed whole because it expands when exposed to liquids. It hurt when it started expanding in her stomach, but she was lucky - it expands slowly and one of her friends saw she was in trouble and rushed her to Sickbay.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4744

Ensigns are going to make my hair go prematurely grey. Talking to Ensign McCants in recovery, seems there's a 'game' going around the younger crewmembers of daring each other to eat or drink unknown stuff. I swear, it hasn't even been two months since I gave that talk about not shoving stuff into your mouth that you can't identify. Am I the only one around here that thinks living to a ripe old age is something to aim for? I hope this close call puts a stop to this crazy game before someone dies.


	36. Stardate 2260.4771 thru 2260.4879

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 176-180

Stardate 2260.4771

Uhura picked up a distress signal from a merchant vessel and we're on our way to see if we can be of assistance. At the briefing, we were told we know pretty much squat. The signal is coming from the USS Armstrong, an Aakenn class freighter - and that's the limit to our knowledge. Mechanical emergency, medical emergency, attack by raiders? We have no way of knowing so, once we get in the right sector, we'll be going in under full red alert status. Best we can do is try to be ready for anything.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4798

Despite periodic attempts at hailing them, we have had no response back from the USS Armstrong. Spock started scanning as soon as we got within long range scanning distance and there do appear to be life forms aboard, but unless something is interfering with the reading, what we're seeing isn't consistent with any known Federation race.

Jim has said we'll err on the side of caution since we don't know what we're dealing with. Full containment suits and three from Security will be beaming over with us once we're in position.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4825

Just gotten back from the USS Armstrong. All we ended up with were more questions. We didn't find a single crewman on board, alive or dead. The life sign readings came from the cargo hold - farm animals in cryogenic suspended animation like they used to use on sleeper ships. Least stressful way to transport animals to the outer colonies.

Jim's sent the Captain's log over to Spock, but so far no clue as to why the crew is missing or where they might have gone. Not so much as one emergency pod is missing.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4852

Jim called me into the briefing room to listen to the Captain's log we retrieved from the USS Armstrong.

In the logs, there was a problem with their warp drive, then shortly after that, a crewman went missing, then another. The immediate fear was that someone onboard had killed them and then airlocking the bodies. But even after the crew started locking themselves into their cabins at night, the disappearances continued.

Jim wants me to take the logs to review and give him a psychological profile on Captain Weimer's state of mind based on them.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4879

After listening to final month of logs, I can see Jim's concern. Captain Weimer's voice went from steady as a rock to that of a man on the verge of a complete breakdown in the span of two weeks. He was the last man standing - was he the one that went mad and killed his crew off one at a time? Being the captain, he had the authority code to override the crew's security locks. I need the Security scans and their medical officer's log to try and make sense out of this.


	37. Stardate 2260.4906 thru 2260.5014

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 181-185

Stardate 2260.4906

I'm being called paranoid, but until we can figure out exactly what happened on the Armstrong, I'm not authorizing anyone to beam onboard that ship without a full containment suit on. At least Jim's not fighting me on that. Which tells me a lot about how much this is bothering him.

Spock and Scotty went over along with Security to download the rest of their logs and scans. Maybe now we can get some answers. Jim has put through a call to Starfleet to see what they want done with the ship and cargo.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4933

Spock, Scotty and myself have been going over the downloaded material - Spock handling the security scans; Scotty, the engineer logs; and me, the logs of Doctor Sorvari, the only medical personnel onboard. While the Armstrong was his first assignment after leaving med school, he followed sound procedures and showed a lot of horse sense - should have heard me trying to explain horse sense and how it isn't an insult to Spock.

After the second disappearance, Sorvari started having the sensors keep track of the crew. Crazy thing? Next one to disappear showed no fluctuations - just stopped.

* * *

Stardate 2260.496

Going through the logs and comparing them to the readings from the medical computer and security scans takes time, but we've confirmed that after the doctor made the determination that the crew members were disappearing in their sleep, Doctor Sorvari was the next one to disappear. After that, it's no wonder the captain started sounding maniac. From the day Sorvari told him that folks were disappearing in their sleep, he kept himself awake by using stimulants. From the readings, his body finally gave in to exhaustion. Shortly after that, his readings stopped suddenly as well.

* * *

Stardate 2260.4987

Jim called a meeting and asked for our conclusions based on what we had been able to get from the Armstrong. My statement was that the crew had been abducted by currently unknown beings for an equally unknown purpose. Scotty agreed with me. Spock didn't care for the wording, but since none of the ways the crew could have used to get off the ship had been utilized, someone or something outside of the ship had to have been involved. Even if Weimer had killed the crew, someone would have had to deal with his body.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5014

Starfleet's orders came through today. Can't say that any of us like them, but we've been ordered to make sure the location beacons are in working order and then leave the Armstrong behind to continue our mission. A salvage ship has already been dispatched to reclaim the Armstrong and tow her to the nearest starbase.

Leaving without knowing what happened to the crew is the worst part. Spock has reluctantly agreed that some outside force must have been involved, but no traces remain to give us a clue as to what that force was.


	38. Stardate 2260.5041 thru 2260.515

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 186-190

Stardate 2260.5041

Glancing at the Stardate, I see that half the year has already passed. Reviewing my entries so far, I can't recall when exactly I stopped worrying about Jim peeking at my logs now and then. Guess I finally got used to it the same way I finally got used to him hanging over my shoulder to read whatever PADD I was working on. At first, that annoyed the hell out of me too. Also, somewhere along the way, I feel like watching over Jim has become a shared responsibility with Spock. Didn't see that coming.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5068

Jim's worried about the crew starting to get too set in routines. I have to I agree with him. From looking over records, some folks eat practically the same food, do the same exercises and relax in the same way every day. Some routine is comforting, but too much is closer to stagnation. On a starship out all on its own, that's not good.

Some of the activities Jim has suggested are a bit odd, but I see what he's doing. Besides, I'd pay good credits to watch Nyota play hopscotch against Spock.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5095

Dodgeball, hopscotch, Double Dutch, capture the flag - yep. Jim's gone into his second childhood and is dragging the rest of us along. I've been 'volunteered' for capture the flag. There will be two teams of six players each, four male, two female - me, Jim, Sulu, Chekov, Uhura and Layali against Hendorff and five others from Security. I think I'm easily the least athletic one on my team, so my main hope is that I don't embarrass myself because I know that with the line-up, there's going to be an audience watching.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5122

Tomorrow is the game and I've got Chapel prepping for injuries - and no, Jim, I am not a worry-wart. I am a doctor well acquainted with treating you and if there's a way to get seriously injured playing Capture the Flag, I know you'll find it. Who says I don't have confidence in you?

Speaking of the game, Jim has our team meeting for a strategy session after our shifts end. He's right about that. If we hope to have any chance at all against Security, we need a game plan.

* * *

Stardate 2260.515

My headache is one of epic proportions. Jim is prancing around my Sickbay, dripping blood from what is likely a broken nose while Hikaru is being treated for a black eye and Nyota is having her hand looked at. Pavel and Layali are over in the corner, giggling like idiots. What all this means? Against all odds and common sense, we won Capture the Flag. Last I saw of him, Hendorff was still wandering around in circles trying to figure out what happened. I'm not too sure myself, honestly. It was all kind of a blur.


	39. Stardate 2260.5177 thru 2260.5286

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 191-195

Stardate 2260.5177

If Jim's plan was to liven the crew up, I have to admit he's been successful beyond anything I could have imagined. I don't think I've ever heard so much talking and laughing in the mess area before. I'm not even sure I want to know how someone managed a cupcake with a sugar crow on the top, but Hendorff took it in good humor.

There's been another side effect of the game. Unless I'm mistaken, Pavel has taken a shine to Layali. Our little boy is growing up, Jim.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5204

Jim came into my office today all snippy, complaining about the way that I addressed him in my last log entry like I was expecting that he was going to read it. I simply let what he'd just said hang in the air for a couple of minutes, then said 'Well, Jim - how would you know what I said if you hadn't read it?'.

At least he had the good grace to look embarrassed before I let him off the hook and told him that him reading my log doesn't bother me any more.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5231

For a genius, Jim can occasionally be a little slow on the uptake. He came back today and asked why, if I didn't mind him reading my logs any more, I still had Spock changing the security on my logs. After I stopped laughing, I told him that Spock is viewing the whole thing like a chess match between the two of them and that, since it was giving Spock an interesting hobby, I was happy to let him keep doing it.

Jim left looking thoughtful. I wonder what the hell he's up to now?

* * *

Stardate 2260.5258

Had to fuss at Jim. He removed Spock's security code from my log and replaced it with one for Spock to break through. If he and Spock want to get into coding wars? Fine, but don't lock me out of my own damn log in the process. Infant. We'll see who gets the last laugh when his next physical rolls around.

Speaking of which, next week, we do our mess personnel. Means me and my nurses will get better food than usual this week. If they think bribing helps, who are we to argue?

* * *

Stardate 2260.5286

We've picked up on another distress signal and we're changing course to go check this one out. Considering the last distress call, Jim's having us go in cautiously. Like the last time, the call is automated, but I hope that's the only thing those calls have in common.

Times like this, I can see where some folks compare space exploration to the North American Old West. If you have a breakdown or something goes wrong, you're a long way from help. And what that means is, unfortunately, sometimes help arrives too late.


	40. Stardate 2260.5313 thru 2260.5423

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 196-200

Stardate 2260.5313

We've arrived and thankfully this isn't one of those too late occasions. It was too close for comfort though. Mining ship returning with a full load had a catastrophic computer failure that affected everything from their replicators to their navigation panel. With the navigation panel down, they never would have reached a starbase before their stores ran out.

Spock is doing workups on the computers while Scotty is double checking the other systems. In the meantime, I'm giving the fifteen crewmembers a checkup. So far, all they seem to need is a good rest.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5340

Spock called us all in for a meeting away from the crew of the mining ship - The Erzgebirge. What happened to them was no computer failure - it was cold-blooded sabotage. Someone had set up a subprogram in the computer that activated when the right amount of certain materials were onboard. In other words, when it was worth the time and effort for someone to steal the load.

We're all in agreement that we need to make sure none of the Erzgebirge crew were involved - and keep them the hell away from monkeying with our computer.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5368

Spock came to my office today to verify that I have baseline readings for each of the crew of the Erzgebirge. He and Jim want to have a meeting with the crew tomorrow while I monitor their readings and see if anyone has a reaction outside what should be normal variables. In other words, kind of like an old-fashioned lie detector test. Hardly the most reliable way of doing things and wouldn't prove anything, but it might give us a direction on who knows something. Which is more than we currently have to go on.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5395

Jim and Spock had the session with the Erzgebirge crew. Their readings were inline with what was expected, so I think we can be fairly certain none of the crew had anything to do with the sabotage. They did give us some information that could prove helpful though. All of the information regarding maintenance had been erased from the ship's computer by the sub-program, but their engineer kept a backup copy on his personal PADD. Since, as Spock pointed out, there was a reason for erasing those specific records, we now have a starting point.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5423

Thanks to the combined efforts of Scotty and Spock, the Erzgebirge is ready to go back in service. Joplin, the captain of the ship, is uneasy at the prospect of going on his way and I can't say that I blame him. Folks that have gone to as much trouble as someone has to steal a load of precious ore might be willing to take another stab at it. That got Jim thinking and, while I'm not thrilled by his idea, the thought of those people randomly killing folks to steal ore bothers me more.


	41. Stardate 2260.545 thru 2260.5558

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 201-205

Stardate 2260.545

For all intents and purposes, the Erzgebirge looks like she did when we first found her. The major difference being that her crew are all safe aboard the Enterprise while we keep track of the ship. Jim's counting on the fact that we have a much greater sensor range than the average ship to give us an advantage as in we should be out of the sensor range of most ship's but they'll be within ours. We can only stay in the area so long before Starfleet objects, so hope we get results soon.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5477

The theory on sensor range worked. Jim waited until Chekov said the incoming ship had locked onto the mining ship and then we were there fast enough that they had no chance to see us coming. The new ship, a Tellarite freighter named Tezlara, is also a mining vessel and one with empty cargo bays. Their original statement that they randomly came across the Erzgebirge was proven false when Sulu checked the course plotted into their helm - their destination was the Erzgebirge. The Tezlara crew are being detained onboard the Enterprise while we figure out the truth.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5504

Talk about your convoluted stories. Captain Graavor from the Tellerite ship told us everything. To make a long story short, the Erzgebirge is owned by a mining consortium and the captain and the miners on her were renting her, apparently not an uncommon a practice with independent miners. Someone at the consortium got greedy enough to start taking big payloads for themselves. Not unheard of for miners that strike it big to disappear for awhile to enjoy their wealth, so nobody thought anything about it. Graavor and his crew are the reclamation end of the nasty business.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5531

I could tell something about this mining affair was bothering Spock so I asked him what the problem was. He showed me to the terminal where he'd been studying the sub-program that shut down the systems. It should have shut down the communications system and distress signal as well. A real computer glitch caused that part of the program to fail which allowed us to come to the rescue in time.

Little whims of fate like that always seem to throw Spock a little. They don't fit neatly into equations. Just like life itself.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5558

Someone shoot me. Just when you think a year can't get worse, we get a transmission from Starfleet. Our orders are to send the Erzgebirge crew on their way, then rendezvous with the Defiant. The Defiant will be taking the Tellerites off of our hands and transporting them to Starbase 11.

I would have been thrilled if we could have finished our mission without getting near Commander Rudman again. Suppose I should look on the bright side - he's not on our crew. And maybe I'll get a chance to talk with Doctor Faulks again.


	42. Stardate 2260.5585 thru 2260.5704

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 206-210

Stardate 2260.5585

The Erzgebirge is back on her way. According to Uhura, Captain Joplin is burning up the airways calling every independent miners that he knows, spreading the word about the sabotage that was done to them. Good. From what Jim and Hendorff have gotten from the Tellerite crew, at least two groups of miners weren't as lucky as Joplin and his crew.

We should be turning the mess over to the Defiant's Captain tomorrow, then Starbase 11 will take over the investigation. From the sounds of it, everything happened within Federation space, so no jurisdiction questions.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5612

we've met up with the Defiant and Captain Blair invited a group of us over for dinner. Dress uniform was optional, bless him. Of course, the only one at the table in the full dress rig was Rudman - Spock and Sulu drew the short straws for being seated on either side of that ass. Turned out to be a pleasant meal with good conversation. Nearly every time that Rudman opened his mouth, Blair would clear his throat and Rudman would shut back up. I was probably far more amused by that than I should have been.

* * *

Stardate 2260.564

While both of our Captains were busy, I managed to have an actual face to face, share coffee while talking visit with Doctor Faulks. Bea felt obliged to swat me - she hoped I had exaggerated about Rudman's personality. After she got that out of the way, we got along great. We exchanged notes on different treatments once I confirmed that yes - I seem to have Starfleet's most allergy-prone Captain under my care. She has a crewman that's sensitive to several drugs as well and wanted notes on which ones worked best on Jim.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5667

The Defiant has headed off toward Starbase 11 and we're back on our way again. With any luck, we'll be able to get back to our schedule and start the physicals for the mess staff that got interrupted by the distress signal.

Jim's trying to talk me into starting running with him. Like I need that - I get plenty of running exercise chasing him down most weeks, but what the hell? If it helps him lower his stress levels, I don't suppose it will hurt to humor him. Maybe my speed will improve.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5704

First day running with Jim. Considering that he does a lot more physical training than I do, I kept up fairly well. Of course, he might have been slowing the pace some for me. Then again, with his constant chatter, he may have had to slow down to avoid running out of oxygen. Infant kept bragging about being ahead. Not that it matters because I'll run with him to keep him from being bored, but I won't race him. Unlike some I could mention, I don't have a competitive streak a country mile wide.


	43. Stardate 2260.5731 thru 2260.5859

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 211-215

Stardate 2260.5731

Okay, maybe this running thing with Jim is going to turn out alright. That tendency of his to chatter non-stop while running is proving to be a - pardon the pun - running commentary on whatever is bothering him at the time. All I need to do is toss in the occasional remark or question and he continues on. I normally can't get him to open up to me like this without a few drinks. Not that we'll forego drinking together, but I prefer us drinking for enjoyment, not for prying out what's bothering him.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5768

Guess my running with Jim made Spock feel left out. He showed up after our shifts were over to ask how I was progressing on my meditations. I got the Vulcan version of a scolding - kind of like the way my grandmother used to do it, only with more eyebrow - when I admitted I hadn't been practicing daily. He's suggested that we do a short joint meditation session daily until it starts becoming a habit. He's convinced that once I get used to regular sessions, it won't feel right if I skip one.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5805

The sub-station proved its worth today. Four injured - the two worst were stabilized in the sub-station while the other two went straight to Sickbay. One of the two at the substation, Lieutenant Miranda, was in respiratory distress before we could get him onto a biobed, so having the equipment needed close at hand was a real bonus. Being able to treat it before it lapsed into full respiratory failure not only saved him a lot of discomfort, it halved his recovery time. Between myself, Scotty and Jim, hard to say who was the most pleased.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5832

Unexpected upside to all this togetherness with Jim and Spock. Between running with Jim before shift and meditation with Spock after, I'm probably sleeping better than I have since we came aboard. Chapel says it hss improved my personality - I've apparently gone from biting the heads off of people to simply biting their necks. She makes me sound like a vampire.

If no emergencies crop up, we should finish the annual physicals on the mess staff tomorrow. Something else I have in common with Scotty - when everything is going well, our main job is maintenance.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5859

I knew something was up when I was the first one at the table on my day for sharing breakfast with Nyota and Christine. When they came to the table in tandem while casting glances back and forth, that confirmed two things. One, whatever the gossip was, it was about me. Two, they didn't think I'd take it well.

Got to admit I'm more stunned than anything. Some imaginative, not to mention dirty-minded, members of the crew have decided that my daily meetings with Spock are due to us having a torrid affair.


	44. Stardate 2260.5886 thru 2260.5994

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 216 - 220

Stardate 2260.5886

Addition to my list of things that Jim is useless for - rumor control. Had a meeting with him and Spock - told them about the rumor. Jim was laughing so hard he about needed oxygen. Gave up on him and asked Spock what he wanted to do. Spock steepled his fingers for a minute, then asked a question I wasn't expecting : 'Does it bother you to have our names linked together?'. When I said not really, he said : 'Then we do nothing. Those that matter know the truth.'

What the hell - couldn't find fault with that.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5913

An excellent example today of what Spock meant by doing nothing. Lieutenant Yeung had enough nerve to approach Spock directly and asked about me and him. Stage one - Spock responded in his usual fashion that he and I have worked together many times and find our styles of research to be complimentary. The lieutenant managed to convey that wasn't the sort of togetherness he was referring to. Stage two - Spock stared attentively the lieutenant, obviously expecting him to spell out exactly what he did mean. After a minute, the lieutenant became flustered and left. I approve.

* * *

Stardate 2260.594

Jim's getting a lot of amusement from the - as he calls it - rumor backlash. Following Spock's lead, anyone with nerve enough to even hint at the rumor gets my full, but silent attention. By the time I finally get around to snapping out 'Spit it out.', they've generally remembered somewhere else they have to be.

Spock and I are continuing to meet and work together same as we have been doing - I think the fact that we're not stopping or trying to hide is doing more to kill the rumor than anything else.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5967

Things seem to be settling back down to normal gossip levels. Still catching snippets of folks whispering to each other, but rumors seem to be about like grass fires. Spread really fast and burn hot, but die down if you don't pile on more fuel to keep the flames going. For all that Spock claims ignorance in the workings of the human mind, he's got us figured out on that point and I'm admittedly grateful for that. I will also admit that those meditation exercises are a good way to keep things in perspective.

* * *

Stardate 2260.5994

My usual weekly time with Scotty and Pavel was mellow. Kid's starting to get a knack for poker and Rigelian Thirty-one. Scotty had to drag Keenser in since you have to have at least four players for Rigelian Thirty-one. Note to self - never play poker with Keenser. Talk about your poker faces.

On the good news side, Scotty and Pavel confirmed that those few still sticking with the rumor aren't finding many people buying it. Guess I won't need to refrigerate my gloves before the next round of proctology exams after all.


	45. Stardate 2260.6021 thru 2260.6139

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 221-225

Stardate 2260.6021

Jim called a staff meeting today. Our current trajectory is going to bring us close to Murasaki 312, a quasar-like formation. As part of our mission, we have standing orders to investigate that sort of phenomenon.

Jim's sending a science party in by shuttle for a closer look and detailed readings. Spock, Scotty and I are going to be part of the team along with four others - Spock to work on the scientific aspects, Scotty tracking how the equipment reacts and me to monitor what effect being in the area will have on our health.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6048

Very rough ride. Somehow the magnetic field of the formation pulled the shuttle off-course and shot us into the planet almost like a bullet out of a gun. Shuttle took some bad damage, but we were lucky - all injuries to our people are minimal. We haven't been able to contact the Enterprise since crashing and Spock doubts that the ship's scanners would be able to penetrate the interference from the quasar's effects. If Scotty can't repair the Galileo enough for us to get airborne, we could be stuck here for quite awhile.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6075

Since we may be stuck here awhile, Spock sent Latimer and Gaetano out to do some scouting to see if they could spot any vegetation or water that we might be able to use. They were attacked without warning by large humanoids - intelligent enough to make weapons, but not technically advanced. Crude or not, their weapons are capable of killing. Latimer is dead.

Boma is blaming Spock for everything that's gone wrong. I admit to playing Devil's Advocate, but that's to point out other options like I do for Jim, not to cast aspersions.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6102

The only luck that Scotty is having with repairs so far is all bad. He says that even if he can get her going, we'll need to lose around 500 pounds. That will mean leaving Latimer's body behind - and possibly two live crewmembers unless we can offload enough non-essential equipment. That thought plus keeping a watch for hostile natives isn't helping morale.

Pulled Spock to the side to warn that he seems cold and uncaring to the crew, but he's convinced that they will respond best to logic. I have my doubts.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6139

We can't survive much longer here. Shuttles are stocked for short term missions lasting a day or two at most. Despite being careful with everything, tomorrow will be the end of our food supplies . Day after that, we'll be out of water. Even if we had supplies, the natives are getting bolder and we are basically defenseless. Scotty has taken our phasers to drain in hopes of giving us enough power to get off the ground.

I feel bad for Spock. I can tell this is affecting him as badly as whims of fate do.

 


	46. Stardate 2260.6166 thru 2260.6274

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 226-230

Stardate 2260.6166

We are in sorry shape. Gaetano was outside relieving himself when the natives attacked. He's dead. Spock's leg is broken as is Boma's collarbone. I'm injured myself, but that doesn't matter. By the time for my next log entry, I'll either be back aboard the Enterprise or I'll be finding out if there is an afterlife. Lifting off is going to be a gamble with the systems patched the way they are. Scotty just hopes we stay aloft long enough for the Enterprise to spot us and bring us aboard.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6193

I believe I saw Spock do the bravest thing he's ever had to do yesterday. He followed an impulsive gut feeling and saved all of our lives, but there's no denying that what he did is bothering him. Him and me need to have a quiet talk together, but that's not going to happen today. His leg is mending as are Boma's collarbone and my ribs. Scotty and Mears got out of this with a few bumps and bruises, but their only real problem is the dehydration and smoke inhalation we all have.

* * *

Stardate 2260.622

We were released from Sickbay with orders to take the next two shifts off.

I asked Spock to accompany me to my quarters and made use of a stash of my grandmother's favorite tea. After handing him a cup, I let Spock do all the talking. The fact that he made his decisions on a purely logical basis and still lost two crewmembers plus the shuttle has his mind reeling. Spock gave me an odd look when I suggested he go meditate and then meet me again tomorrow for more tea and conversation, but he agreed.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6247

Today, I did most of the talking over our tea. I'm not sure if I got across what I was trying to, but I think a lot of Spock's problem is he keeps thinking in chess terms with strategy - which is all well and good, but not when our opponents aren't even up to checkers. Sure, it's a bad idea to underestimate an opponent, but isn't it equally bad to overestimate them? Spock didn't immediately dismiss what I said and even suggested we get back together again tomorrow after his meditation.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6274

Took three days of tea and conversation, but finally got to what was really bothering Spock - acting on a gut feeling saved five lives when using logic had lost two.

I poured him a fresh cup and explained my theory that gut feelings **are** logical. I figure they're what we've learned, what we've observed - whether consciously or not - and experience all wrapped into one. Like when our Security chief goes on alert for no obvious reason. Or when Scotty says the ship feels wrong. Spock finished his tea and said he needed to meditate.


	47. Stardate 2260.6311 thru 2260.6429

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 231-235

Stardate 2260.6311

Spock showed up on my doorstep with one of his mother's favorite herbal tea blends. Kind of a mix of Terran and Vulcan tastes which I actually found rather pleasant - a lot of Vulcan spices literally burn my tongue, but this mix gave the spicy taste without the heat.

After due consideration, Spock has decided that I might have a valid point regarding gut instincts, though he said it in a way that implies he plans to make a study of that. Once a researcher, always a researcher. Regardless, it sure beats endlessly rethinking past decisions.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6338

Met with Jim today for my debrief on the Galileo's last mission. I verified that I had examined the bodies of both Latimer and Gaetano, confirming that they died in the line of duty. I also commended Spock, Scotty and Mears for keeping their heads under very trying conditions. After much thought on the matter, I made the recommendation that Boma not be considered for future landing parties. I also recommended a reprimand for myself. I wouldn't change what I said to Spock, but I should have aired my concerns further away from the others.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6365

Jim called a meeting regarding discrepancies between Spock's report and mine. Racked my brain to figure out what the discrepancies might be - from his eyebrow position, Spock was wondering as well. Jim started right in.

"Bones, you recommended Spock receive a commendation and a reprimand for yourself while Spock recommended a commendation for you and a reprimand for himself. After review, I judge that the recommendations cancel each other out as I believe that the situation has strengthened your working relationship. Dismissed."

Sounded like a good reason to share another pot of tea, so we did.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6392

Barring unforeseen accidents or random acts of Jim, we should finish the last of the annual exams within two weeks. Be nice to see the end of them for a little while. Some of our experiences out here have given me a few ideas for possible improvements and other members of my staff are looking forward to some research time as well.

Arrangements are already being made for us to divert to a Starbase once a replacement has been shipped out for the Galileo. In the meantime, we're going to be surveying planets in this quadrant.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6429

Quiet day of physicals and paperwork. When I had lunch with Spock and Jim, Spock brought up my comment about chess and then asked if I would assist with him learned other games that have strategic components to them. After a quick check with Scotty and Chekov, Spock has been invited to drop in on our card game lessons. You know, even without seeing him with cards in his hands, I can already tell Spock will be as hard to read as Keenser. I wonder how hard it will be to teach a Vulcan how to bluff?


	48. Stardate 2260.6456 thru 2260.6564

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 236-240

Stardate 2260.6456

Today was the first session of trying to teach Spock some of the same games we're teaching Chekov. Good thing we only get together about once a week because I think it will take that long for Scotty to recover from today. The more he tried to explain the finer points of poker, the more Spock seemed to want to figure out the odd and percentages of the possible hands.

No question - I'm going to have figure some way to make bluffing sound logical to Spock or we aren't going to get any where.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6483

Three quiet days in a row, which means my staff is starting to get jittery. That might sound odd, but my staff has the theory that the longer a quiet period lasts, the worse the incident will be that breaks it. I wish I could come up with an instance to disprove that theory, but honestly? I can't remember a single one.

We're heading now to the Starbase to pick up the new shuttle. The Galileo wasn't our only shuttle, so not sure why we need a replacement. I'll have to ask Jim.

* * *

Stardate 2260.651

Got around to asking Jim about the shuttle. Normally we would carry-on with one less shuttle, but where we're doing the deep space mission, Starfleet made the call to make sure we have a full set of shuttles while we're still in easy range of a Starbase. Guess that makes sense.

We dock tomorrow and will be picking up the shuttle and a few other last minute supplies. This could well be our last visit to a Starbase for three to four years.

Quiet again today. Now I'm starting to get edgy too.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6537

The new shuttle is onboard. One thing this detour was good for? I was able to request restocking on the supplies that we've gone through faster than originally projected. Some things we can replicate, some things we can't, but I prefer having the cushion of extra supplies in our dispensary.

Jim decided to stay docked long enough for our entire crew to have the chance for a four hour break on the Starbase. I agreed that was a good call for the crew's morale. Pretty sure Jim plans to drag me to the bar.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6564

Our stay at the Starbase couldn't have gone smoother. As expected, Jim pulled me off to a bar, grabbing Scotty and Spock on the way. Technically, we ate first and then went to the bar. No fights or other drama, just each of us sipping on our beverage of choice and having a conversation.

Jim convinced all of us to tell a story of the funniest incident we'd ever seen - rephrased to most unusual in Spock's case, but damned if his story didn't about make me lose my breath from laughing so hard.


	49. Stardate 2260.6601 thru 2260.6709

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 241-245

Stardate 2260.6601

Christine spotted us yesterday laughing our heads off at the bar. I tried telling Spock's story to her, but honestly, it's not that the story was funny as it was the fact that it was Spock telling it. It was one of those 'you had to have been there' things.

The staff and I have added all the new supplies to our inventory and stowed them away. Leaving the starbase gave me an odd feeling. In one sense, we're no more alone than we ever are. In another, we've never been so alone.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6628

The ship received a subspace transmission from Starfleet - Nyota told me over breakfast that with our current distance from Earth, that message took over three weeks to reach us. That sort of delay kind of boggles my mind. Guess I'm too used to instant communications, but this sounds like the stories my grandmother told me about her grandmother's letters she used to exchange with a pen pal in Ireland.

Back to the transmission. A scout ship picked up some odd readings coming from the Gamma Trianguli system and Starfleet wants us to check them out.

* * *

Starbase 2260.6655

Tomorrow we reach the Gamma Trianguli system. The sixth planet in the system is a class M and also, according to the report from the scout ship, the source of the strange readings.

Due to the fact that this planet has never been explored, Jim's ordering a larger than usual landing party - nine altogether. Starfleet's orders are peculiar - which I did point out in the briefing and Spock agreed with me. The orders are to make contact with the inhabitants without regard to the Prime Directive. Something is funny and I don't mean humorous.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6682

We've entered orbit over Gamma Trianguli VI and are taking readings in preparation for tomorrow's landing party. The planet is teaming with plant life and has an oddly constant temperature of 24.4 degrees Celsius with only a slight variation at the poles - an environmental condition thought to be impossible according to Spock.

Adding to the impossible? The presence of humanoid life forms, but no other animal life is being detected. Not even insects. Maybe that's why Starfleet told us to disregard the Prime Directive. There's no way humanoid life evolved here independently.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6709

Only time for a brief entry. Three dead, one in critical condition, one in serious condition. The remainder of the landing party is battered, physically and mentally. Jim is taking this hard. Thinks if he'd done something different, we wouldn't have lost people.

Spock and I conferred together while I treated his burns. Jim took the Security chief's advice and beamed down with more Security personnel than usual. To avoid what happened? He'd have had to known what was going to happen in the future. Kid's good, but nobody's that good.


	50. Stardate 2260.6736 thru 2260.6844

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log Entries 246-250

Stardate 2260.6736

Repairs are underway from the close call yesterday. We nearly lost the Enterprise and everyone aboard her. If we'd been stranded on the surface, we wouldn't have outlived them by much. We didn't conform to Vaal's standards.

Hendorff will be in Sickbay a little longer, but he's going to make it. He was lucky that nearly all the thorns were stopped by his uniform or he'd never made it back from the planet alive. Him recovering was the only bright point to a day when I had to perform three autopsies.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6763

No surprises with the autopsies. Mallory died from the trauma of an explosion equivalent to the landmines used on Earth in the 20th century, only this landmine was a rock. There wasn't really a lot left of Kaplan - charred bone and ash, but what remains there were are consistence with death by a lightning strike. Marple's skull was crushed from a blow delivered by a man that not only had never killed before, but who had no more concept of what death is than a child does.

I don't understand. I really don't.

* * *

Starfleet 2260.679

Another disadvantage of being this far away from Earth? I can't go and personally deliver a much needed kick to the backsides of a few people.

Today, we received another message from Starfleet, still ordering us to make contact with the natives of Gamma Trianguli Six, but this time they remembered to mention the little fact that after the scout ship reported getting strange sensor readings from the area, no further communications came from it. I have the nasty feeling that the crew of that scout ship met the same fate Vaal intended for the Enterprise.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6817

Spock and I met up today to discuss the last message from Starfleet. He's of the same opinion I am regarding the likely fate of the scout ship. In fact, he requested the records on that region from the nearest Starbase.

Spock has conjectured that Vaal had to have some sort of matter/anti-matter conversion to be turning fruit into energy. If that's true, Vaal may have been using that weird signal to lure ships close enough to investigate so that it could make use of them for raw materials. Sounds probable to me.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6844

Spock received the records he requested and has found at least six ships that were known to have passed through the Gamma Trianguli system that were never heard from again. There could be other reasons besides Vaal, of course, but with that many ships? Bet he was responsible for at least some of them and who knows how many ships got too close that didn't have a flight path registered?

The upshot to this research is that Spock is no longer questioning the ethics behind us shutting Vaal down. Next? Dealing with Jim's guilt trip.


	51. Stardate 2260.6871 thru 2260.6979

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 251-255

Stardate 2260.6871

Lured Jim to my quarters with the promise of a bottle that I picked up at the last starbase. When he saw it was a bottle of apple jack, he started laughing. It was good to hear that again.

After a couple of drinks, I eased into the subject of what happened on the planet. I reminded him that once we figured out something was very wrong, he did try to get us off the surface, but, by then, the transporter had been affected.

I finished off by threatening to sic Spock on him. I will, too.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6898

Today is Sulu's birthday. Jim has a policy that folks don't stand duty on their birthdays unless we're under alert status, so Hikaru got to spend his day indulging in his favorite hobby. I ventured into the Botany lab to give him his present - some seeds I managed to get from one of the botanists at the last starbase, along with information cards for each giving growth needs. The excitement on Hikaru's face as he looked over the cards? Well, it made it worth filling that botanist's flask with my best bourbon.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6925

Nyota gave me a light ribbing at breakfast regarding the gift I gave Sulu. She apparently had to practically pull him away from the botany labs to get him to his own birthday party.

On a more somber note, tomorrow will be the official memorial service for our three fallen crewmates, after which their remains will be consigned to space similar to the way our sea-going predecessors were consigned to the waves if they died at sea. Spock and I have already overseen the packing of their belongings, which will be shipped back to their families.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6952

Hendorff asked to say a few words at the memorial service. After consulting with Jim, I agreed with the stipulation that I stay with him to monitor his condition. I'm glad he was able to speak - he knew all three well.

Marple was with Hendorff on that night of the bar fight with one James Kirk that's become ship legend. Kaplan and Mallory were best friends - grew up together, joined Starfleet together.

Once Hendorff finished, Jim called everyone to attention in final respects to our honoured dead while their remains were consigned to the black.

* * *

Stardate 2260.6979

I spent most of my day doing grief counseling. We do have a psychiatrist onboard, but most folks are reluctant to go see her and, in a way, I can understand that. Folks feel that she's someone they see if there's something wrong with them, but there's nothing wrong with them feeling loss because their crewmates died. If the deaths seem to have triggered off other issues, I steer them her direction, but otherwise? I sit them down, give them something to drink and I listen for as long as they need to talk.


	52. Stardate 2260.7006 thru 2260.7114

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 256 - 260

Stardate 2260.7006

Jim insisted that I take time off and enforced it by telling Christine that Sickbay was off-limits to me except in an emergency.

I didn't have plans to do anything until Nyota showed up at my door. It was her day off as well and we ended up spending the day talking, playing goofy board games and picking the music we had playing in the background. By the time I walked her back to her quarters, I was more relaxed than I'd been in a long time. Guess I did need that time off.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7033

Good day today. Hendorff came up clear on all of his tests which means we've finally been able to flush the last of those toxins from his system. I'm releasing him from Sickbay, but he's under orders to remain off-duty for the next two days and do nothing more strenuous than a moderate walk or swim. After that, he can pull desk duties for a week while he gradually ramps up his activity level. If everything looks good at the end of that week, I'll release him back to full duty status.

* * *

Stardate 2260.706

Today defines bad day. I went into the lab area where I have a couple of experiments running to check on them. I was already in the room when it occurred to me that no-one else was in the area. Someone is **always** supposed to be on duty in the area. Turned out that Lieutenant Andrews had an accident with a biologic and contaminated the lab, but didn't follow contamination lockdown procedures. So yours truly is in isolation until we can determine if I'm infected.

Spock is going to rip Andrews a new one.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7087

Blood work has confirmed that the disease is in my system. The only thing we know for sure? It means is that I'm going to be spending more time in isolation. Until now, the disease has only been found among Benzites and is normally only spread through direct contact with an infected individual. As it is now my dubious honor to be the first human recorded as contracting a Benzite disease, the main concern is that I could set off an epidemic.

I really dislike isolation, but at least I'm catching up on my paperwork.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7114

I've entered the active phase of the disease, which translate to Melnisic Fever and, among the Benzites, it has a high mortality rate. As for myself, my current symptoms are irritated eyes with the whites of my eyes now having an odd bluish tinge, a slight fever and extreme lethargy.

I've been working through the computer terminal in my area to try and help out with figuring out how to fight this, but it's frustrating when I tire out so quickly. Jim is trying to keep upbeat, but I can tell he's worried.


	53. Stardate 2260.7141 thru 2260.7249

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 261-265

Stardate 2260.7141

CMO Log Supplemental. Commander Spock recording. Doctor McCoy has entered the next stage in the progression of the disease. While several aspects of how the disease is presenting itself differs for the progression in a Benzite, there are several general similarities which lead us to speculate that Doctor McCoy will enter the most virulent phase by tomorrow morning. It is during that phase that the majority of deaths occur in Benzites, so should the doctor make it through tomorrow, there is every reason to believe he will recover.

In the meantime, our search for a vaccine continues.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7168

CMO Log Supplemental. Commander Spock recording. Doctor McCoy's condition took an unexpected turn when his mild fever of 38C spiked to a dangerously high 41C. Before any steps were able to be taken, his temperature rapidly dropped down to 38C again. The episode was so brief that without constant monitoring, it would have gone unnoticed.

Since the spike, Doctor McCoy seems to be resting easier. I speculate that he should awaken tomorrow, which will be a great relief to Captain Kirk as well as to those who must deal with the Captain on a regular basis.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7195

CMO Log Supplemental. Commander Spock recording. It did not occur until mid-Gamma shift, but Doctor McCoy woke up briefly. I was fortunately present at the time and filled him in on what his changes his condition had undergone since his last lucid period. When I remarked that he had beaten the odds quoted by a Benzite doctor regarding his survival, the doctor simply smiled and said 'too damn stubborn to die' before he went back to sleep.

I will have to meditate on this later. Perhaps there is a practical side to human stubbornness after all.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7222

CMO Log Supplemental. Commander Spock recording. I have received a rather stern lecture from the Head Nurse regarding my discussion of Doctor McCoy's condition with him. I saw no logical reason to withhold the information from him.

Regardless of her concerns, the doctor's condition has continued to markedly improve. His temperature is now 37C, generally viewed as human norm. Only faint traces of the blue coloration remain in the whites of his eyes. The lethargy remains, but his periods of alertness are gradually increasing. I see no reason to doubt that full recovery is imminent.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7249

Taking back over my log even though I am still, as my Head Nurse states, crabby and tired. Part of that she can lay at her own doorstep - I overheard her fussing at Spock for answering my questions truthfully. When I want the facts, I want the facts, not some sugary concoction somebody else thinks is better for me to hear.

Still haven't got the energy to wrestle a kitten, but I can feel things improving, so I'm trying to be patient. Think I have an idea for the Benzite doctors to try as well.


	54. Stardate 2260.7276 thru 2260.7384

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 266-270

Stardate 2260.7276

Long comlink discussion today with several Benzite doctors. Their monitoring systems do periodic temperature checks rather than continuous, so the temperature spike that I experienced had never been listed as an effect of the disease. Benzites have lower core body temperatures than humans - the doctors agreed that the temperature spike, though brief, would do considerable damage and is likely behind the high mortality rate.

We're hopeful that pre-emptive regulation of body temperature in Benzites will lower the number of deaths from this disease until an actual cure can be found. Unfortunately, only time will tell.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7303

Enough is enough. Christine started fussing about the length of time I spent speaking with the Benzite group while I'm still recovering. Asking me to take things easy is one thing - demanding total inactivity is another.

I get that it was a nerve racking time for all concerned because they didn't know what to expect. I don't get the attempts to wrap me in damn cotton batting like I'm on death's door when my blood shows no live disease cells are left - speaking of, I have a theory on that to test.

* * *

Stardate 2260.733

First time since the lab incident that I was able to sit down to a meal with Jim and Spock. Felt good to start returning to routine again even if the meal was constantly interrupted with folks stopping by to see me. You'd think I'd been gone for a year the way that some were acting, but it didn't bother me much. Nice to have been missed.

As a side note, I've been asked by Chekov to chaperone the first actual date between he and Layali. I agreed since I know her father.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7357

Chekov worked up the nerve to come to my office and ask how I knew Lieutenant Commander Minyawi - otherwise known as Layali's dad. Told him the short story version that he was in charge of the security detail when I was part of a medical team doing vaccinations back during my Academy days. Also told him that Okpara Minyawi was not a man he wanted to get on the bad side of. He's not a man that expects his daughters to be treated like princesses, but he does demand that they be treated like ladies.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7384

First night chaperoning Pavel and Layali. Dear God - was I ever that young? If youthful hormones cause amnesia in later years, I, for one, am grateful. Then again, maybe I should keep a closer eye on Jim. If his hormone level ever decreases, he could get a wicked case of amnesia.

Layali's not really much older than Pavel and both kids are fiercely proud of their own heritage. At one point in the night, they got into a good-natured debate over who developed certain things first - the Russians or the Egyptians - that I found hilarious.

 


	55. Stardate 2260.7411 thru 2260.7519

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 271-275

Stardate 2260.7411

Personally, I think I'm ready to go back to full duty, but Jim insisted I take another day and I didn't feel like arguing with him. Which, I suppose, does kind of prove his point.

Spent my half-day doing more grief counseling. Some of the crew who survived both Nero and Khan are having what is best termed as survivor guilt. Not surprising really. It feels like a lot longer, but it's only been a little over a year since Khan was defeated and we got Jim back. Still have nightmares myself, honestly.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7438

I guess that Jim's still peeking at my log. Nyota popped in after her shift for a visit that turned into a long talk about me keeping things too bottled up inside for my own good. Really couldn't argue her point and I told her that she missed her calling as a prosecutor. Which got me laughed at and swatted.

Nyota really is easy to talk to though. We both grew up with strong grandmother figures in our lives, so she gets where I'm coming from when I talk about something that bothers me.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7465

I've caved to the various demands that I transition back into work slowly. Already at half days and every other day, I'll tack on another hour until I'm back up to a normal day. People around here are never happy. Disagree with them and they argue. Agree with them and they worry.

Speaking of people making me crazy? Scotty couldn't wait until our usual day to come up and give me a nudge about the newest rumor regarding my so-called love life. It seems that now, Nyota and I are an item.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7492

Don't believe I've made mention of his work recently, but today Scotty finished the modifications on the last of the biobeds in Sickbay. Since my people have gotten used to the new style, the older ones were being avoided, so it's clear that my staff really likes the changes.

I managed to have a word in private with Uhura over the latest rumor Scotty heard. Seems Scotty didn't hear all of it. Not only are Uhura and I together, but we're in a threesome with Spock. Jim is probably somewhere cackling. Infant.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7519

Nyota has the wickedest sense of humor on this ship. Does she give folks the evil eye that she suspects of spreading rumors? Nope. She sashays down the corridors like she hasn't got a care in the world and has been linking her arm with me, Spock, Jim, Pavel, Scotty and Hikaru any time that she happens to be walking the same way as any of us are.

I suppose the next rumor will involve an orgy, but you know what? The whole situation has grown too ludicrous for me to give a damn any more.


	56. Stardate 2260.7546 thru 2260.7656

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 276-280

Stardate 2260.7546

We're going to be entering the Malurian system in two days. The only reports of the area that we have are from scout ships, but the Federation is considering sending a science team into the area. To pave the way for that, we need to fully chart the system and make contact with the inhabitants. The scout ships have indicated that the natives of the main planet in the system have interstellar capabilities, so we don't have to worry about the Prime Directive in regards to technology. Here's hoping for a nice quiet mission.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7574

Uhura has made contact with the Malurian leadership. We've been invited to beam down for a face to face meeting after we enter orbit around Malura - third of the five planets in their system, also called Malura. Long range scanning shows their population is a bit over four billion - anyone wanting the exact number can go read Spock's log.

For once, I'm looking forward to this. There are no recorded descriptions of the Malurians in the Federation databases and I really hope I'll get the opportunity to interact with one of their doctors.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7601

The Malurians are a fascinating group and very welcoming. As I had hoped, I got to spend time with two of their doctors, a married pair named Kihr and Vivr. They had a hard time with our names as well, so mutual amusement and nobody taking insult. They're vegetarians, which meant Spock got to eat well.

Their skin is fascinating - closest correlation to Terran is snake scales, but they're a warm-blooded species. Another similarity to snakes is the beautiful patterns of colors on them. Today was getting to know each other - tomorrow is business.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7629

Got to spend the entire morning with Kihr and Vivr. They're as intrigued by Terran skin and hair as I am with theirs. The Malurians don't have hair, but they do have a frill that runs up the sides of their necks and up across their heads. Their frill generally lies flat, but flairs up and out when they're in a good mood.

The meetings have all gone well. The Malurians are open to the possibility of a station being established in their system and are also expressing interest in possibly joining the Federation.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7656

Leaving the Malurian system today and heading for the neighboring system that they call Cushr. The Malurians suggested we might want to consider that system for another possible outpost - the system has no known life forms and seems to be a fairly young system as well. Getting to study a young system could have a lot of appeal to scientists - heck, even Spock looks excited. Well, excited for him - which meant he raised both eyebrows at the same time at the prospect of a closer look.

Tomorrow is my next round of chaperoning for Pavel and Layali.


	57. Stardate 2260.7683 thru 2260.7793

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 281-285

Stardate 2260.7683

We've entered the Cushr system and are currently orbiting the fourth planet from the sun, the one that shows the most signs of eventually developing into a life supporting planet. The surface is still mostly molten, but crust is already forming in some areas. I'm having an absolute blast watching Spock and listening to him spouting out observations. He's acting like a kid - a Vulcan kid, but still, a kid.

How contagious is Spock's enthusiasm? Very - Chekov is working alongside him and I had to remind Chekov that he has a date tonight.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7711

Layali probably learned more about the formation of a planet than she ever cared to last night. Pavel was still so excited about the research he was helping Spock with, it was nearly all he talked about. Fortunately for both, she was more amused than annoyed by his enthusiasm. I gave her a pat on her shoulder and reminded her that one day, she was going to be bubbling over with excitement over a discovery with the protein enzymes that are her favorite study field and he'll have to return the favor of listening to her.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7738

Much to the disappointment of both Spock and Chekov, today will be our last day in the Cushr system. Spock is submitting a strong recommendation for that science outpost in the Malurian system to monitor this system - there are no planets or satellites geographically stable enough to use for an outpost in the Cushr system yet.

Spock has the entire Science Department outside of Medical working of gathering as much data as possible during the time we have remaining here. He's going to be happily analyzing for months. As researchers, we have a lot in common.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7766

We left the Cushr system this morning and were well on our way to the next system needing charting when Uhura reported a distress signal from Malura. It was short and no details to it, but Jim's turning us around to see what the trouble is.

We won't get back there until tomorrow at the earliest. Uhura's been transmitting to them and monitoring all frequencies for any response, but so far there hasn't been one. I can't help but wonder what might have happened. I hope Kihr and Vivr are all right.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7793

Jim called me to the Bridge. When I got there, Uhura was still trying to raise Malura. I was just about to ask Jim what he wanted me for when Spock turned from his panel. He told Uhura that there was no point in trying to contact the planet any longer. I don't know if I've ever heard the Bridge go so silent as when he told us that the long range scanner was showing no signs of life. No people - no animals - nothing. Surely that's impossible. Something must be interfering with our readings.


	58. Stardate 2260.782 thru 2260.7930

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 286-290

Stardate 2260.782

I am part of the landing party beaming down to Malura. The sensors were right - plants are still here, the buildings seem untouched, but there is not a single Malurian that we can find anywhere. Not even a body. There's no sign of a mass evacuation besides which I doubt any planet could evacuate billions of people in such a short time span. Jim has ordered us to spread out in teams of two to see if we can find any clues.

I'm going to where Kihr and Vivr worked - Jim's going with me.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7848

Vivr was in the process of recording some findings whenever whatever happened occurred, but neither Jim or I can make out what it was that happened. The recording was audio only and there was a very brief high pitched noise and then? Nothing. No scream, no gasp, not even a thump. What could have happened so quickly that she didn't even have a chance to react?

We're beaming back up. Jim ordered a transmission to Starfleet informing them that the entire Malurian race has either been destroyed or somehow kidnapped in mass by unknown agents.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7875

My Sickbay beds are nearly full and we have personnel missing, presumed dead. All due to the same damned insane hunk of machine responsible for the genocide of the Malurians. It calls itself Nomad and the only reason any of us are alive is that it has convinced itself that Jim created it.

Whether Spock will admit it out loud or not, this is hitting way too close to home for him. Nomad succeeded in doing to the Malurians what Nero attempted to do to the Vulcans. I believe we all agree that Nomad must be destroyed.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7902

Things have gone from pretty damn bad to even worse. Jim ordered Nomad to allow Spock access. He discovered that the original Nomad had collided with a probe from another galaxy. Both were damaged but the other probe had the capacity for making repairs. It merged itself with Nomad and, in the process, screwed up the original programming.

Now, Nomad has concluded that it needs to merge with the Enterprise to better carry out its mission of eradicating imperfections throughout the universe. The only thing keeping it at bay is it thinking that Jim is its creator.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7930

It's finally over. Jim and Spock managed to activate a self-destruct on Nomad - unfortunately while the damned thing was still on board. Scotty and Chekov double-teamed the transporter controls and got it off with only a few seconds to spare. We were still too close - Scotty's going to be repairing damages for awhile. Thankfully, he and his engineering crew can handle them without needing a space station. We are likely to have find a planet where we can beam up raw materials for the replicators to work with though. Hopefully an uninhabited one.


	59. Stardate 2260.7957 thru 2290.8067

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 291 - 295

Stardate 2260.7957

My grandmother said her own grandmother had a saying that she always used - there's never a great loss without some small gain. I suppose in the whole Nomad incident, my small gain was that we definitely gave the new biobed design a workout. With all the jolts and jarring we experienced, not one patient was knocked off of their bed or suffered any additional injuries. Thank you, Scotty - I most surely owe you those drinks. And if I'm not mistaken, most of my staff will be offering to treat you to a round as well.

* * *

Stardate 2260.7984

Since Scotty and I both have a lot to do cleaning up after Nomad, we won't be having our usual game session with Chekov and Spock. I've got more work than usual because Nomad injured three of my nurses - Chris, Layali and Thrani. They'll all be fine, but Chris and Layali will be on light duty for at least two more days and Thrani is still on full patient status.

We have four men missing, presumed dead. As with the Malurians, no trace of bodies to confirm that so Hendorff is reviewing security recordings.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8012

Jim poked me again about leaving important things out of my log. Nomad had come across Ensign Nichols singing and literally blanked her memory to satisfy its curiosity about music. We're having to reteach her everything from the alphabet on up. I know it's going to affect her personality, but she's looking on Chris as her maternal figure and me for the paternal one. Call me a coward, but I'm glad the issue of telling her real family that she has no memories of them won't come up for a few years.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8039

The deaths of the four security men have been confirmed. We'll be holding a memorial service for Xue, Dawson, Chelanga and Sarr tomorrow. Jim asked my opinion on how much should be told to the families. Since their bodies would have been consigned to space regardless, I see no point in burdening them with details.

There will be another memorial tonight. I wasn't the only one onboard that got to know some of the Malurians. We were going to get together and hold what I guess might best be called a wake to remember them.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8067

There was a sizable showing for the wake to remember the Malurians last night. Seemed to surprise some folks that Spock came, but I expected it. Like I said before, the whole incident was a little too close for comfort.

After it was over, Spock came over and told me that he was going through what they had managed to download of Nomad's memories to try and backtrack where that damned thing had been. Gives me the shudders to think that there may be other worlds out there that are also dead now because of it.


	60. Stardate 2260.8094 thru 2260.8203

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 296-300

Stardate 2260.8094

Spock has made the request that we follow the path that Nomad did and Jim has agreed to it. The valid point has been made that if Nomad has caused damage to or deaths at any outposts of a non-Federation power, Nomad's actions could potentially be considered an act of war.

And to think Nomad's original programming was to seek out new life-forms. This definitely backs my Academy instructor's opinions about why sending machines to do first contacts is a bad idea - though I sincerely doubt she ever imagined anything this catastrophic.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8121

Still in the process of back-tracking Nomad to who knows where. We're about to enter a sector that's never been explored by a Federation group before, so there's no telling who or what we might encounter. If nothing else, we'll have a lot of new data for Starfleet to chew on.

Nomad didn't appear to deviate from his course, which lowers the chances that he ran across another inhabited world, but I have a bad feeling. Spock gave me his 'you are being illogical, Doctor' look when I told him that.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8149

I knew it was going to be bad when Jim came to my office saying Spock had asked him to come here for a meeting after our shifts ended. I knew it was really bad when Spock came with both a bottle and a teapot.

Nothing was said until we were all settled with a drink - Jim with a whiskey, Spock with a tea and me with a 'fortified' tea. Spock finally translated part of the unknown part of Nomad's download. It was coming from launch point Alpha - homeworld of the probe that merged with Nomad.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8176

Now in the home system of the probe that merged with Nomad. Two of the planets in the seven planet system show structures, but so far, no life readings. Beaming down to the outermost of the worlds was . . . bad is so inadequate a word. The smell of rot and decay filled the air. Not from bodies - like Malura, there are no bodies. The smell is from food that had been ready to eat or ready to sell. I advised we needed to wear self-contained breathing gear - breathing these fumes and possible alien spores isn't healthy.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8203

Just finished our second day on the outer world. Spock has revised his statement of 'no life forms' to 'no land based life forms'. Studying the samples of these people's language here, Spock made further inroads and was able to translate the other probe's mission. It was a pretty innocuous - gather soil samples and sterilize them. Mix that order with one to seek out new life? Recipe for disaster.

The soil directive meant Nomad ignored water based life, so the aquatic life still exists. Spock is guessing the spores growing came from molds on driftwood.


	61. Stardate 2260.8231 thru 2260.8337

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 301-305

Stardate 2260.8231

On our approach to the second planet of the system, Uhura received an SOS coming from that planet - and not an automated one either.

Spock and Uhura combined talents and have managed to establish communication between us and an underwater science outpost. There is a group of around thirty scientists plus their support staff and they appear to be their races only survivors. They've requested assistance and Jim has agreed. They seem to be in shock over what happened on the surface - and really, who could blame them? Death on that large a scale is incomprehensible.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8258

It took coordination on both sides, but the survivors of the planet - S'toivan - are now on the surface, trying to cope with the enormity of their loss. Uhura has been busy handling translation duty, but we're starting to understand one another in basic ways.

They're an empathic race - can't be easy to deal with all this. I'm not sure how much I'm helping, but several of them have come to me requesting to be held, so I'm holding them and letting them hold me for as long as they need.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8285

Jim and Uhura have been in meetings with them on what they want to do from here while Spock and I have been holding joint sessions for the survivors.

Some of the survivors were among those that had designed and programmed the probe that had met and merged with Nomad. One of them broke down when he talked about it. The reason they'd sent out the probe was because they were becoming over-populated and were looking for a world to colonize. They had interstellar ships as well, but don't know yet if any survived.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8313

While I can't say that things are looking great for the people of S'toivan, I can say that they're looking better. Uhura's contacted two of their ships and they're heading back to join forces with the other survivors. Uhura's still trying, but it looks like those two ships may be the only ones that were far enough out to avoid Nomad.

Jim and Scotty have been doing great work getting the ones already here organized. It's been decided they'll move to one of their smallest cities by the water.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8337

Spent another day with Spock doing counseling while Jim, Scotty and the rest of the crew aided in helping the other survivors get moved to the city they'd chosen. It will be much better for them when the ships come back. Right now, they simply don't have enough folks to do even the minimum of what needs to be done to keep a city going.

I'm glad that Jim has made the call that we're going to remain here and lend a hand until their ships return. Gives us longer for additional sessions.


	62. Stardate 2260.8364 thru 2260.8474

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 306-310

Stardate 2260.8364

The first of the ships arrived today. It's the larger of the two with a crew of around 450. The other ship should arrive tomorrow and bring up the numbers by around 300 more. Colonies have started out with far fewer number, but still? Not a lot of folks for a whole planet.

We're too far out to communicate directly with Starfleet, but we've relayed word back through the nearest Starbase. The remaining citizens here are willing to allow a Federation base to be established here in return for assistance in protecting the planet.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8392

Double good news. The remaining ship made it back safely and we've received word that the Starbase is sending a ship here with supplies and some personnel to assist here until the outpost is established.

Security is a concern because there are so many empty cities. The citizens fear - rightfully so - that if word gets out, the cities will be looted or, even worse, they could be invaded and their remaining population enslaved or slaughtered. Jim has agreed that we'll remain in the area surveying the rest of this system until the Starbase folks arrive.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8419

We've been contacted by the group coming over from the Starbase. Jim's coordinating it so that Spock, Uhura and myself will meet with them before they go planetside so that we can fill them in on what we already know about their language, customs and general physical traits. Then we'll beam down first followed by them so that we can handle introductions and smooth the transition.

It's days like this, watching Jim handle both the diplomatic and practical sides of a situation, that I remember why I followed him out into the black.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8446

Spock and I had a long meeting with the Starbase personnel. It was interesting seeing the looks on their faces when it dawned on them it was a Vulcan/Human team that had been doing the counseling so far. All I can say is, shows they don't know us very well - Spock was good for them when they needed to hold it together, I was good for them when they needed to let it out.

Introductions went well and we're resuming our exploration mission now. Got to admit I'm going to miss these folks.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8474

Spock and I were both given a couple of days off by Jim because of the amount of time we spent in counseling sessions, but I found myself oddly restless. After a couple of hours of me straightening things that were straight to begin with, I had a request for entry from Spock. When I gave permission for him to come on in, I noticed he had a tray full of stuff with him including tea and incense.

I guessed right that he intended for us to share a meditation session. Have to admit, I needed it.


	63. Stardate 2260.8501 thru 2260.86

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 311-315

Stardate 2260.8501

Jim showed up at my door declaring it the anniversary of the first time I threw up on him. I have to take his word on that because I don't remember, but I was willing to go with it. We see each other a lot, but mostly as Captain and CMO instead of as Jim and Bones. Yeah - he has me calling myself that now. Sad.

What wasn't sad was hanging out together for a few hours, catching up with a little not-so-healthy food, drinks and a good recording of a bad movie.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8529

One piece of very good news - after three weeks of re-education, Ensign Nichols grabbed me in the middle of a history lesson, practically giddy. It seems that whatever Nomad did to her hadn't wiped out her memories, but rather made them inaccessible. How it was able to do that? I don't know, but the important thing is that either it wore off or the lessons we've been giving her have bridged that gap.

I recommended a couple of days off for her to adjust before returning to full duty and Jim approved it.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8556

Ran into a problem today that I should have been expecting if I'd thought about it. Even though it wasn't any fault of her own, Ensign Nichols feels badly about having forgotten her family and friends. She also still feels a connection to myself and Christine even though her memories are back.

I gathered all three of us in my office and we had a long talk. No more Ensign Nichols, we'll be calling her Grace. Neither of us mind her considering us as family - to be truthful, it's been kind of nice.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8583

We're currently in route to the Beta Geminorum system, which has only been mapped remotely up until now. First indications from long-range sensors have shown that conditions are suitable for the development of life forms, but no readings indicating the presence of anything but plant life so far. If our observations match the readings, we could be looking at one or two locations for future colonies.

Jim's pleased that I've gotten comfortable enough onboard to accept his invitation to go to the Bridge to get a first hand look at Pollux Four tomorrow.

* * *

Stardate 2260.86

I went to the Bridge when Jim gave me the call and got to admire the view of the planet for all of maybe two minutes before we had some crazy alien attack our ship and usurp our communications.

The stuff the man was spouting sounded like when I read Homer and Sophocles to the point where, when Jim wondered out loud who the man was, I answered automatically.

"He looks like images of Apollo."

The attack stopped immediately and I've been commanded to beam down in the morning - along with Jim, Nyota, Hikaru and Pavel.


	64. Stardate 2260.8638 thru 2260.8748

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 316-320

Stardate 2260.8638

Jim was making jokes as we went to the Transporter room - things like 'A god - and you think I have an ego problem, Bones' - but it was just Jim's way of trying to keep everyone on an even keel.

What happened, I can't say. All I know for sure is that one minute we were moving into position to transport and the next minute, I'm all by myself in some sort of formal garden with Greek architectural features. My communicator isn't working and my tricorder seems to only be good for recording this.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8666

Fell asleep and woke to find my uniform replaced by a blue tunic. There was a bowl of fruit nearby. Couldn't find anything wrong with it, so I was eating when Apollo popped in, scowling. Great - a pissy Greek god to deal with.

"You. You know me."

I corrected him.

"I know who you appear to be."

"Your Captain calls for you. He calls you doctor. You are a student of Hippocrates?"

"In a manner of speaking, yes."

"We will talk again after I speak with the maiden."

Nyota? That's not going to go well.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8693

Apollo came to me demanding answers - why won't they kneel to me? Why doesn't the maiden love me?

I have mixed emotions here. The doctor in me sees a being in literal pain from countless years of isolation and loneliness, but he's not acknowledging that humans have changed since he knew them. I tried to explain that Nyota is far more Amazon than shepherdess and that, while the other might believe in a god, he isn't the one they worship.

He didn't take that well. I'm recording this after regaining consciousness.

* * *

Stardate 2260.872

I was still sore from yesterday when Apollo suddenly grabbed me, then threw me down in front of the others while yelling.

"My patience is near the end! You will teach them! You will gather laurels and light the sacred fires and make sacrifices to me!"

Jim and the others, bless them, were by my side almost immediately even though all of them looked as rough as I felt.

"When I return tomorrow, you will give me what is mine by rights or you will feel my wrath!"

Chekov spoke after Apollo disappeared.

"He looked very tired."

* * *

Stardate 2260.8748

Shortly after Chekov spoke, Jim's communicator went off. There are occasions when Spock's voice can sound downright sweet. The ship is still stuck, but Spock managed to verify an unusual power source nearby which we helped trace to the largest Grecian structure. Since Apollo always disappears right after any show of power, we hope that if the Enterprise can manage to take out that structure, it might give us all a chance for freedom before he kills somebody in a fit of godly temper.

I hope my next log will be recorded on the Enterprise.


	65. Stardate 2260.8775 thru 2260.8884

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 321-325

Stardate 2260.8775

It's over, but I can't say that I'm settled with how it ended. None of us escaped without injury. Uhura got off the lightest, Jim and I got it the worst. Me mainly because he blamed me for not teaching the others right, Jim because he was trying to protect me.

Once the structure was destroyed, Apollo gave up. When he'd spoke about what had happened to his fellow gods, he'd described it as them spreading themselves on the wind. Didn't really understand what Apollo meant until he did it himself.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8802

Jim and I are under observation while the neurologic damage we took mends. I guess Jim thought I was too far inside my own head because he nudged me.

"Bones? Would it really have been so bad for us to gather up a few laurel leaves?"

I told Jim that no, picking laurel leaves wouldn't have been a big deal, but they wouldn't have made Apollo happy. He demanded more than we could do.

Jim nodded and I could tell he wanted to say more, but the medications we're on put him to sleep.

* * *

Stardate 2260.883

Knew Jim would only leave things alone for so long before asking. I knew it was time when he poked me. Infant. He wanted to know why the whole thing with Apollo bothered me so much. Told him that I knew what it was like to be that kind of lonely.

Jim got quiet for a minute then asked how I'd dealt with it.

Answered that by looking him straight in the eyes - told him it hadn't been an issue since he'd come along.

That grin of his makes a lot of things better.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8857

Went over the charts with Christine this morning and, much as I'm not thrilled with it, I agreed that it appears that two days of limited duty are needed to finish out the recovery process. My smart-alecky head nurse said that while she didn't wish the Captain ill, she did wish that his time as a patient coincided with mine more because I always behave myself when we're patients at the same time to set a good example for him.

You can tell that gal has Southern roots when that sass comes out.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8884

Today's the first day that Jim has really chafed at the inactivity, but he settled back down when I reminded him it's only for one more day. His impatience is a sure sign that he's on the mend, but I had to ask why it took him longer than usual to complain.

For his answer, I got a shrug and the comment that it seemed weird to complain about it to me when I was going through the exact same treatment. Damn. Christine might have had a point with what she was saying yesterday.


	66. Stardate 2260.8912 thru 9021

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 326-330

Stardate 2260.8912

I accompanied Jim up to the Bridge at the start of his first full shift since the Apollo incident. There's an almost palpable feeling of everything being right when Jim's in the Captain's chair. I'm sure someone would say that's just my own opinion coloring the way I perceive things, but when I look around at the others on the Bridge? Their body language tells me that they're having similar reactions.

I still have my doubts about destiny, but I don't have any about Jim and the Enterprise belonging together.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8939

My heart is still pounding. Idiot. Well, I wanted to see what would happen and now I know. I went to the Observation Deck by myself and damn near had a panic attack before I could get back out.

I want so badly to be able to see what Jim sees when he looks into the Black. From the look he gets in his eyes, what he sees is glorious. When I look? It's still darkness and death. Closest I can come to what I see is when I look through a microscope at a disease.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8967

I've caught Spock studying me at least three times today. It's enough to make my paranoid and wonder what I did or didn't do, but I know that couldn't be it. Lord knows Spock isn't a bit shy about letting me knowing if I've neglected to do something or did it in a way other than what he would have done.

Since I can't even begin to guess what this might be about, guess I'll have to invite him over for tea tomorrow and ask what's going on.

* * *

Stardate 2260.8994

Spock accepted my invitation to share tea. I had started on cup number two when I gave up rewording it in my head and flat out asked if there was a problem.

He was silent for a minute, then apologized, confessing that he had been told that I had seemed upset two days ago and, while encrypting my log, he had taken a look at it.

I laughed and told him he was starting to act like Jim. He raised that brow and said that since he was apologizing, there was no need to insult him. Hobgoblin.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9021

While sharing a meal with Jim and Spock, Spock made an unusual offer. We've both mind-melded with Spock in the past and he said that he would be willing to do so again to allow us to see the Black the way that the other sees it.

Jim's enthusiastic about this. I'm not so sure. It might sound silly, but I don't like the thought that my phobia might somehow taint the way Jim looks at things. Still, I know that Spock thinks this is important or he wouldn't have offered.


	67. Stardate 2260.9049 thru 2260.9158

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 331-335

Stardate 2260.9049

I decided that If Jim was willing, so was I. At Spock's suggestion, we're taking this one at a time. Through the scientific method of coin flipping - and yes, Spock did his rendition of an eye roll - Jim viewed things through my eyes first.

It seemed to genuinely surprise Jim. Maybe on some level, he thought I was being melodramatic, but honestly, I do try to keep my feelings under wraps as much as I can. He gave me an incredulous look when I told him it's worse when he's not with me.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9076

Today was my turn to see the Black as Jim does. It was - well, I don't know if there are words for it. It's not really a great comparison, but my grandmother really had a thing about watching the Wizard of Oz every year during the holidays. On one side of the rainbow, everything was ordinary and in black and white. On the other side, everything was new, different and in dazzling colors.

Spock was fascinated and said, had he not known better, he never would have guessed we were looking at the same thing.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9103

Jim, Spock and I ate together, then ended up in Jim's quarters to talk. Since Spock was the one controlling the melds, he knows what we saw and he's apparently given it nearly as much though as we have. He ventured his opinion that, while it would be better for my personal comfort to work on how I view the Black, my general attitude toward it is a good balance to Jim's enthusiasm. Spock used his favorite Earth cat for an example - Jim sees the beauty and strength - I see the teeth and claws.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9131

We started picking up on a distress signal today. Several odd things about that. One, the signal bears resemblance to old Earth codes - odds are against that being a random coincidence. Two, there are no registered colonies out this far or known ships. Uhura's been sending responces, but the signal message and pattern have remained identcal, which means that it's probably automated.

Nothing about this distress signal makes any sense whatsoever, but we're tracing it to its source to investigate. Jim's ordered full range scanning in case this is some sort of trap.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9158

Long range scanners have now determined that the signal is coming from one of the planets in the solar system we're approaching. Third planet from the sun and that doesn't appear to be the only similarity to Earth. Initial readings are showing that the planet has the means for supporting life, but some of the readings are peculiar. The atmosphere shows indications of past industrial wastes, but from the amount showing, either industry is minimal or has all been converted to non-polluting technologies.

Guess we'll find out more when we enter orbit tomorrow.


	68. Stardate 2260.9185 thru 2260.9295

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 336-340

Stardate 2260.9185

Still no response from the planet, but we are picking up life readings - quite a few. So why isn't anyone answering?

Jim's leaving Spock in charge onboard the Enterprise and will be heading up the landing party. Five of us going down tomorrow - Jim, me as Medical Officer, Doctor Marcus as Science Officer along with Lieutenants Hendorff and Galloway from Security.

I wish we had some idea of what we're going into. Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised. Maybe Spock will show up for his shift in a kilt. Both are about equally likely.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9213

Beaming down was like entering a museum where they recreate past eras, only a museum would have been in better shape. The buildings resemble twentieth century Earth, but haven't been tended to for a long time - decay, neglect, and rust everywhere.

I picked up a broken toy and was attacked by a male afflicted with some terrible disease. As Jim pulled him off of me, he started crying like a child about the toy before going into spasms and dying. I've never seen a disease like this. We don't dare return to the ship.

* * *

Stardate 2260.924

So far, we haven't heard anything but children's voices and we've only seen one of them up close - a young lady named Miri who was terrified of adults. Or Grups, as she calls us. She seems to have a crush on Jim, which helped because she knew where the doctors worked. Called it the bad place.

Told Carol it was lucky that the children considered the labs a bad place - everything seems intact. Spock beamed down the supplies I requested and I've taken tissue samples. Let's see what we're dealing with.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9267

While I've been studying tissue samples and coordinating with Spock, Carol sifted through the paperwork left behind on a Life Prolongation Project. I'd heard about this bunch in history. Their experiments had been deemed unethical, but some folks with way too many resources funded them leaving Earth to continue their work elsewhere. They were never heard from again. Until now.

What happened here could have happened to Earth. Makes me sick to think about, but these children are all over three hundred years old. And doomed to die a horrible death when they reach puberty.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9295

Everyone has blue blotches to varying degrees now - and after Spock finished running my figures through the computer, we have our time limit. In one hundred seventy hours, the entire landing party will be dead.

What Carol and I are keeping to ourselves is that our remaining time to solve this puzzle is closer to five days - we need to be able to think coherently to have any chance of finding the cure.

Jim's given the orders that no-one else is to beam down here until - or if - we succeed. Dammit, what am I missing?


	69. Stardate 2260.9322 thru 2260.9431

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 341-345

Stardate 2260.9322

Carol and I have been pouring over the researchers' notes - the biggest problem is trying to get a handle on the way they were thinking.

I can see why they were banned from this study on Earth. They were creating a designer virus. More precisely, a series of designer viruses that were supposed to strengthen human cells and, in turn, extend lifespans.

As Carol notes, semi-successful. They did extend life, but only for those that hadn't hit puberty - by the records we found, Miri has aged about three months in the past three hundred years.

* * *

Stardate 2260.935

Another day down and all I've really got to show for my work is a headache. Carol is showing the strain with her increased impatience. For instance, the fact that Miri is plainly jealous of Carol amused her just two days ago. Today, Carol snapped at the girl. By the records, increased irritability is one of the symptoms. We'll all be snapping at each other soon.

No wonder the children hide from us. When the adults started turning on each other, some of the children were bound to have been hurt or killed as well.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9377

Jim and I nearly got into a physical fight this morning. Only Carol's intervention kept it from going further. We apologized to her and to each other, but it was like that burst of adrenaline gave me a clearer head. I spotted a mistake I made yesterday on a calculation and found it - the core of the disease that we've been searching for.

I think Carol might have given Jim and me bruised ribs from the way she hugged us at the news. It's still a race, but we have a fighting chance now.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9404

During my sleep period, all hell broke loose. One group of onlies started pelting Hendorff and Galloway with rocks and trash. Galloway went down when he was struck in the head. We pulled him to safety, but while we were distracted, all of our communicators were stolen. I hadn't seen Carol since my rude awakening and asked about her, but no-one knows where she is.

With Carol missing, only me running the race now - without help from Spock and the Enterprise's computers. Hendorff and Jim have gone to search for Carol and the communicators.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9431

Jim and Hendorff still haven't returned with Carol or the communicators. I think I have concocted the vaccine, but without access to the Enterprise's computers, I can only guess at the proper dosage.

I'm leaving this log along with a set of notes for you, Jim. By the time you hear this, it will be over for me one way or another - I'm sorry for testing the vaccine on myself this way, but I ran out of time. My reason is slipping and I nearly destroyed everything before I stopped myself. Forgive me.


	70. Stardate 2260.9459 thru 2260.9568

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 346-350

Stardate 2260.9459

CMO Log Supplemental. Commander Spock recording. The landing party is now back aboard the Enterprise after the correct dosage for the vaccine was determined and administered. Doctor McCoy remains comatose from an overdose of the vaccine at present time.

All of the landing party required treatment with the worst injuries being sustained by Doctor Marcus who was mob attacked when she tried to prevent the theft of the communicators.

The Captain wants to begin inoculating the children, but after reading the Doctor's notes, I am hesitant to perform that task until I can consult with him.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9486

CMO Log Supplemental. Commander Spock recording. Doctor McCoy's brain scans are showing signs of improvement. The medical team estimates that he will regain consciousness sometime during the next 48 hours.

When I expressed that I did not understand the Doctor's actions, the Captain played the Doctor's last entry. Knowing that his actions were to ensure that his and Doctor Marcus' research would not be lost does help in understanding why he took the risk. We would not have been able to replicate the research in time to prevent the deaths of the landing party.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9514

CMO Log Supplemental. Commander Spock recording. Doctor McCoy has regained consciousness, but does not seem aware yet of his surroundings or circumstance. The Captain and I have been assured that is not unusual for someone coming out from under a chemically induced comatose state. It will not be possible to fully access any damages suffered until he becomes more responsive.

I assisted in calculating the proper dosage for Miri and one of the older boys, both of whom were already showing beginning blotches of the plague. I am still recommending holding off on other vaccinations for now.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9541

CMO Log Supplemental. Commander Spock recording. Nurse Chapel reported Doctor McCoy was awake and asking for me. Upon arrival, the doctor greeted me briefly then quizzed me on the health of the other members of the landing party while Nurse Chapel remained nearby. Once assured that the others were well, Doctor McCoy smiled and went back to sleep.

Looking to Nurse Chapel, she seemed embarrassed to say that Doctor McCoy said that I was the one he could trust to tell him the truth.

I do not believe that I will ever fully understand the medical mind.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9568

CMO Log - Commander Spock recording at the request of CMO Doctor McCoy. The Doctor is alert for longer periods of time, but his stamina remains well below his usual levels.

As per Doctor McCoy's request, a full spectrum of physical examinations have been performed on Miri and the boy named Jahn. As he seemed to already suspect, they have both begun to age at a normal rate for a human. The question still unanswered is if it is safe to administer the vaccine to a prepubescent child in whom the disease has not yet presented itself.


	71. Stardate 2260.9596 thru 2260.9705

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 351-355

Stardate 2260.9596

Taking back over my log. Appreciate Spock stepping up, but I can handle this at least.

We're still in orbit around Miri's planet. The situation with the younger onlies is a moral dilemma. From their current aging rate, some won't hit puberty for another seven to eight thousand years - that would require three hundred plus generations worth of folks needed to raise them.

While I personally believe it would be best for their mental state for the children to return to a normal aging pattern, knowingly shortening someone's lifespan goes against the grain.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9623

Round table meeting concerning the onlies today with myself, Jim, Spock, Carol, Christine, and Nyota. I also requested Pavel to join us as the youngest of the crew. Glad that I did as he brought up some things I hadn't even considered. Like how there might be any number of families on other colony worlds that might be happy to adopt some of the children, but couldn't due to the plague still in their system. His vote was that the chance for being able to become part of a family should be a deciding factor.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9651

Everyone agreed to sleep on - or meditate on - the onlies overnight and then meet again today. After much consideration and debate, we are in agreement that it would be cruel not to investigate if the vaccine can safely be given to the younger ones. If we can eradicate the plague in them, it will open up a host of options to them. Otherwise, they would remain essentially trapped on this planet until they hit puberty and received the vaccine at that time.

Spock and I will be running a series of tests in the lab starting today.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9678

Carol joined forces with myself and Spock - the vaccine is as safe for the onlies as we can make it. We've even figured the dosage going by their weight. We explained things to Miri and Jahn - not sure how much they actually understand. The onlies are, even though all are over 300 years old, too young mentally for informed consent.

As Spock pointed out, we're not taking any thing from the onlies but a disease that will eventually be fatal if not cured. And he's right. We're beginning to administer the vaccine today.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9705

Everything's going well with administering the vaccines. Better than I expected truthfully, but that's due to Miri and Jahn. If it weren't for their help, not only would we not know how many onlies are here, I doubt we could have gotten anywhere near them.

Jim's asking for volunteers to remain behind to take care of the onlies and start getting them used to being around adults again - I've been firmly told that I can't stay, but I already knew that. I have a say in approving the final group though.


	72. Stardate 2260.9733 thru 2260.9842

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 356-360

Stardate 2260.9733

The volunteer group remaining on the planet have been chosen - two from Security, two from Medical, two from Engineering, two from Sciences, one from Communications and one from Command. I didn't expect her to volunteer, but Carol Marcus is one of those that will be remaining behind. I wished her well before they beamed down. I'm going to miss her.

Among other supplies sent down was a replicator. The onlies need clothing and the remaining food stores of the planet are dangerously low. Good thing the distress signal was going. The onlies would have starved.

* * *

Stardate 2260.976

We're back In the Black and I was reminded that tomorrow is Christmas Eve by the explosion of tinsel everywhere. Those inexperienced with a Christmas aboard the Enterprise under the command of James T. Kirk might think I'm exaggerating, but I'd bet that Spock would back my description. Hell, he'd probably say I understated the amount of decorations. Even Nyota has a bit of tinsel wrapped around the base of her ponytail.

Jim's looking forward to the party tomorrow because I promised that, for one day, I would ignore his sweets intake.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9787

I'm sure I don't want to know how Scotty managed to program the replicators for it, but mistletoe is hanging everywhere. For most folks, either the mistletoe or Spock becomes invisible when he's underneath it. Me? I simply gave him a peck on the cheek and moved on - to Nyota's applause. Not like she has to worry about me poaching her Vulcan.

This is a good day. No emergencies, no attacks. Even the crew members that don't celebrate Christmas seem to be enjoying the festivities and the odder customs - like the mistletoe.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9815

Spock and I are exchanging what might best be called bemused expressions as we sip on tea while I record this. Our shift is off-duty and the room is full of soft - and not-so-soft - snoring. Nyota's head is pillowed in Spock's lap - Jim's head is resting on mine. Scotty, Pavel and Hikaru are in what my grandmother called a puppy pile - hard to tell where one stops and another starts.

To not go into too many details that might come back to haunt certain folks, it was a great Christmas party.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9842

Maybe it was an after-effect of Miri's planet, but the Christmas celebrations onboard were more subdued this year. Not to say that folks didn't get together and celebrate, but none of them were what I'd deem over the top. Statistics match my observations - we didn't even have a fourth of the requests for hangover remedies as we did last year.

Today, I held a get-together for my Medical team - a picnic style meal held in sickbay as we talked about what went right and what went wrong during the past year.


	73. Stardate 2260.9869 thru 2261

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Log entries 361-366

Stardate 2260.9869

I met with Scotty and told him that, during the meeting with my staff yesterday, it was agreed that his revision to our biobed system has been a huge asset to us in our work. He seemed embarrassed when I told him I was recommending the alterations be implemented fleet-wide and had proposed that he receive a commendation.

His reaction - like what he'd come up with to relieve boredom while he recovered was no big deal - made me think about the number of exceptional minds I get to work with on a daily basis. Amazing.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9897

Pavel and Layali requested a private chat. They've decided that, for now at least, they're going to go to a less formal relationship and will no longer be needing my services as chaperone. I think they're being wise. They're too young to settle down - especially while out on an extended mission like we are.

Christine has a superstition about New Years that I'm happy to indulge. She wants everything as close to perfect as possible before the year changes, so she and the rest of the nurses are on a cleaning binge.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9924

Obviously Jim still listens to my logs. After our shift, he came in, poured us both a drink then mentioned that he'd thought Pavel and Layali had made a cute couple. I told him not to pout - they hadn't broken up, they simply decided to dial things back a bit. Then I waited until Jim took a drink to mention that them not needing a chaperone any more meant I would be available to chaperone him and whoever he was spending New Years Eve with. Waste of the drink he spit out, but worth it.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9951

As rotation falls, New Years Eve is a day off. Jim came by and invited me to attend the year end festivities with him and Spock. I got swatted when I said I could trust the two of them together without a chaperone.

I accepted, of course. If someone had told me at this time last year that Spock and I would have the sort of off-duty relationship we currently have? I'd have given them a psychological evaluation. Now? I guess us finding common ground is one of the best things to happen this year.

* * *

Stardate 2260.9977

Not long to go before we begin year 2261. This is really reminding me of how Christmas was - folks are celebrating, but mostly without the extremes I saw last year. I know that sounds good, but any major deviation is cause for concern.

Mentioned it to Spock and Nyota - Nyota has a theory. We're far from home and getting farther away daily. She thinks the holidays have reminded folks how much longer we'll be gone and how much further we'll be going into the unknown. I do believe the lady is onto something there.

* * *

Stardate 2261

2261 has begun - reviewing my logs as Jim suggested. We lost ten crewmembers over the course of the year. When I entered that data into the computer, it came back notated as an acceptable percentage of loss for a crew of our size.

Someone please put me out of my misery if the day comes that I start using acceptable in reference to a death. Whether I decide to continue this log later or not, I end it with the names of our lost : Aronica, Latimer, Gaetano, Mallory, Kaplan, Marple, Xue, Dawson, Chelanga and Sarr. Acceptable, my ass.


	74. Index by Subject

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For those (like me) who can't remember what Stardate something occurred on, a rough index by entry follows for those looking for a particular story arc.

Apollo ( **Who Mourns for Adonis** ) - Entries 315-322

Argelians (Race)/Nelphia (Planet)/Argelius B (System) - Entries 3-6

Biobed Redesign - Entries 153, 155-156, 159-160, 167-168, 170, 291

Breaking Routines - Entries 187-191

Chess Match Chekov vs Spock - Entries 42-44

Chekov/Scotty/McCoy - Entries 124, 220

Christine/Uhura/McCoy - Entries 123, 215-219

Christmas 2260 - Entries 357

Commander Rudman - Entries 62-70

Contamination - Entries 258-267

Copernicus Mission/Death of Lt Aronica - Entries 18-31

Cushr System - Entries 281, 283

Engineering Medical Sub-Station - Entries 34-38, 161-162, 169, 171, 213

Ensign Terrick/Vandemeer - Entries 7-9, 12-17, 73-84

Erzgebirge - Entries 195-206

Galileo Mission ( **Galileo 7** ) - Entries 221-227, 232-233

Gaming Lessons with Spock - Entries 235-236

Gossip - Entries 215, 273-275

Kirk/McCoy - Entries 192-194, 210-211, 251, 311, 323, 325-326

Kirk/Spock/McCoy - Entries 119, 121-122, 173, 186, 214

Landing Party Mishap - Entry 163

Log Encryption Wars - Entries 10-11, 96

Malurians (Race)/Malura (Planet)/Malura (System) - Entries 276-280, 284-287, 295

McCoy Chaperoning - Entries 268-270, 282, 362

Miscellaneous Medical - Entries 90-92, 94-95. 97-99, 151-152, 154, 157, 271, 324

 **Miri** \- Entries 334-356

New Years 2260 - Entries 1 & 2

New Years 2261 - Entries 362-366

Nomad ( **The Changeling** ) - Entries 288-290, 292-294, 296-300, 312-313

Plant Experiments with Spock & Sulu - Entries 32-33, 44-45, 93, 150

Pollux Four (Planet)/Beta Geminorum (System) - Entries 314

Pon-farr ( **Amok Time** ) - Entries 101-113

Raiders - Entries 45-55, 86-89

S'toivan - Entries 301-309

Side Effects of Alien Food/Beverage - Entries 39-41, 125-127, 156, 174-175

Space, Opposing Viewpoints - Entries 327-333

Spock/McCoy - Entries 71-72, 114-118, 164-166, 172, 212, 228-231, 310

Starbase 3 - Entries 46-62

Starbase, picking up replacement shuttle - Entries 239-241

Sulu's Birthday - 252-253

Talosians ( **The Menagerie** ) - Entries 128-149, 158

Too Quiet - Entries 237-238

Uhura/McCoy - Entries 256, 272

USS Armstrong - Entries 176-185

USS Defiant - Entries 207-209

Vaal ( **The Apple** ) - Entries 242-250, 253-255, 257


End file.
